Both my girlfriend and I have a problem. I love sex and she knows it but for me to get it she says that she has to have her fun too.
Fun for her is to tie me up to the post of her bed and use real knives and scissors to pretend she is removing my genitals.
It scares the hell out of me because she is schizophrenic and her mood can go from extremely happy and playful to extremely sullen and angry in just a few minutes.
I talked to a counselor about it and he said that playing games like that with her was like playing Russian roulette with my manhood. He called it a symbiotic sexual addiction, I was addicted to the thrill of being helpless and she was addicted to the thrill of her power. He seemed pretty convinced that one day the play acting would turn real.I could tell that the counselor was really concerned about my welfare.
But what he said just made the whole thing more thrilling.
The sharpness of the blades is so scary that my whole body shakes uncontrollibly from the fear of it and my heart pounds almost out of my chest.
For those few minutes everything hangs in the balance. She tells me what she could do and how much she would enjoy making me into a eunuch and I can only lay there hoping that she won't do it.
It's all up to her and for those few minutes I'm so totally terrified that I can hardly breathe.
Then she puts away the knife and the release of the tension is so strong that I get a rush of wondrous euphoria and that feeling is what I am after and why I keep doing it with her.
Fun for her is to tie me up to the post of her bed and use real knives and scissors to pretend she is removing my genitals.
It scares the hell out of me because she is schizophrenic and her mood can go from extremely happy and playful to extremely sullen and angry in just a few minutes.
I talked to a counselor about it and he said that playing games like that with her was like playing Russian roulette with my manhood. He called it a symbiotic sexual addiction, I was addicted to the thrill of being helpless and she was addicted to the thrill of her power. He seemed pretty convinced that one day the play acting would turn real.I could tell that the counselor was really concerned about my welfare.
But what he said just made the whole thing more thrilling.
The sharpness of the blades is so scary that my whole body shakes uncontrollibly from the fear of it and my heart pounds almost out of my chest.
For those few minutes everything hangs in the balance. She tells me what she could do and how much she would enjoy making me into a eunuch and I can only lay there hoping that she won't do it.
It's all up to her and for those few minutes I'm so totally terrified that I can hardly breathe.
Then she puts away the knife and the release of the tension is so strong that I get a rush of wondrous euphoria and that feeling is what I am after and why I keep doing it with her.
