I Carry A Shameful Secret

My childhood wasn’t great; children’s homes, orphanages, foster parents; you get the picture. In my teens, I met David, who was in his forties and handsome. He would ring me when he was in town, and I would meet him in a hotel. He was always gentle, and I loved submitting to David. He bought me clothes, gave me money and treated me brilliantly; I loved him. I used to be excited at David making love to me and enjoyed it. I also liked girls which was confusing.

The last time I met him he was with another guy who was older, and one of David’s clients. I didn’t like Frank; he was an older man, overweight and bald. All three of us ended up in a hotel, and I let them both do whatever they wanted. I disliked having Frank in my mouth, and although David was always gentle during sex, Frank wasn’t, and I felt like I was being split in half; he also called me names when inside me. After he’d been inside me, he wanted me to take him in my mouth, I didn’t want to, but David convinced me to. It was horrible. Frank also wanted to cum in my mouth, which I didn’t do with David, he did though, and it was disgusting. He had also dug his nails into my ass cheeks during sex and left cut marks that hurt for days.

When Frank left, David apologized and told me Frank was an important client, and I would need to meet them both again the next week; he also gave me a hundred pounds promising two hundred the next week. I never saw either of them again, ignoring David’s future calls.

I’m now married and tell my wife everything, but I have never told her about my Bi-sexual past with David. I was traumatized by the David and Frank encounter but couldn’t talk to anybody about it; at the end of the day, I accepted money and g*fts for sex, and I was and am ashamed.