I feel inlove with this girl, she was the first girl i really loved. everyday i'd wake up and think about her, all day long, all night long. jsut all the time. We dated for a year... had alot of troubles because of long distance (really long distance) and the fact that I was insecure. She had more experience than me and was younger. I felt inadequate. I hated her for had being with the people she had been and done what shed done.. I jsut wanted to be her first in something. I didnt feel like a man with her. Anyways we had more troubles, fight with long distance. we started talkign less... but she came to see me for a week.. it was the first time id see her in 6 months.... things were really ackward and .. i felt jsut as hurt with her around as with her gone... I had an obsession,..,. and that was to fuck her in the ass. That was 1 thing she didnt like (therefor had almost never done) and i wanted to do soemthign with her she had never done... but she wouldnt let me.. So that week she came and visited.. thigns were ackward.... we hadnt been together in 6 months and she was only there for a week.. yet like 3 days 4 days had gone by and still no sex.... jsut a kiss here and there.... 1 night she was asleep... and i got really horny... and fingered her ass for like 5 min... i wanted to fuck it but i didnt want to wake her up.... in the morning she knew what i had done because i had done ti once b4 a logn time ago.. and she could feel it apperently... from that point on she lost all respect for me pretty much.. stop talkignt o me and all that .... now its like.. 5 months later... and im still not over her... i feel ashamed of what i did... and now she seems to only remember me as that horny insecure guy... and she dosent remember all the wonderful times we had together and what we felt (i know this lil story makes me sound to be a huge jerk but i loved this girl and she loved me .. and except for a few big mistakes.. i treated her like an angel)

please some1 tell me i'll get over here... because now.. almost a year later like since we were really inlove... i havent dated any1 or been able to get her out of my for a day or even half a day.