Lesbian Female / 30
Throwing Myself Into My Marriage And My Family
I knew by the time I finished high school that I was probably a lesbian. I kept it to myself, I didn't act out. College was very intense for me. I had failed to make Valedictorian in high school, I came in second. I was going to be number one in my class in college. I had no interest in getting involved, my family involvement was enough. I don't recall having any sexual desires, no matter who I met.
Two weeks before graduation I was number one, I was graduating Suma Cum Laude and I had a job lined up with a big firm. In two weeks I would walk, my parents would hear me address my graduating class. And two weeks before graduation I was ravaged by a man. It wasn't enough for him to ravage me, he demanded a hot breakfast sitting at the head of my table. I lost control, I screamed at him, he put his index finger on my lips and told me not to raise my voice at him.
My parents came for graduation. I had planned dinner out with them the night before. He told me to join him with his parents. At dinner my mother asked me why I was so nervous. She dragged out of me that he wanted me with him. She knew right then. And told me the man owned me, I had better get over there.
I was always at ease in public speaking, but he was right there looking straight at me. It was my worst performance. I slept with him that night, my parents at my apartment. I had no choice but to take him over and introduce him. Facing my father introducing the man that he knew I slept with the night before was the most embarrassing day in my life.
My job started in September, by then I had missed every period since graduation. My mother pushed us into eloping. With a reception later. Having a wedding and baby shower at the same time brought out the best in my mother and the worst in my father. He bought me a new, big, four door Volvo, for me and the baby. We moved into a two bedroom unit.
Later, one day picking up my son, my mother confessed that her fears of me doing something stup!d were set aside when I got my ass knocked up. By the time my hormones calmed down, and my marriage was on a solid footing my mind began to wander. My feelings for a girl at work took me by surprise. I was cautioned not to get involved, but I was deaf to that advice.
My husband gave me an ultimatum, I had no choice but to swallow my pride again, my mother and father, my husband and my son had to come first. I got over the pain of breaking up with her by getting pregnant again.
Two weeks before graduation I was number one, I was graduating Suma Cum Laude and I had a job lined up with a big firm. In two weeks I would walk, my parents would hear me address my graduating class. And two weeks before graduation I was ravaged by a man. It wasn't enough for him to ravage me, he demanded a hot breakfast sitting at the head of my table. I lost control, I screamed at him, he put his index finger on my lips and told me not to raise my voice at him.
My parents came for graduation. I had planned dinner out with them the night before. He told me to join him with his parents. At dinner my mother asked me why I was so nervous. She dragged out of me that he wanted me with him. She knew right then. And told me the man owned me, I had better get over there.
I was always at ease in public speaking, but he was right there looking straight at me. It was my worst performance. I slept with him that night, my parents at my apartment. I had no choice but to take him over and introduce him. Facing my father introducing the man that he knew I slept with the night before was the most embarrassing day in my life.
My job started in September, by then I had missed every period since graduation. My mother pushed us into eloping. With a reception later. Having a wedding and baby shower at the same time brought out the best in my mother and the worst in my father. He bought me a new, big, four door Volvo, for me and the baby. We moved into a two bedroom unit.
Later, one day picking up my son, my mother confessed that her fears of me doing something stup!d were set aside when I got my ass knocked up. By the time my hormones calmed down, and my marriage was on a solid footing my mind began to wander. My feelings for a girl at work took me by surprise. I was cautioned not to get involved, but I was deaf to that advice.
My husband gave me an ultimatum, I had no choice but to swallow my pride again, my mother and father, my husband and my son had to come first. I got over the pain of breaking up with her by getting pregnant again.
