Still Confused After 20 Years.

I was talking to my friend at work and she was telling me about this article she had read about, concerning members of the clergy who had abused their position and taken advantage of the innocent. The more I thought about what we had discussed, my mind went back to something that had happened to me as a 17 year old. I was almost sick as I thought back to my incident and reliving it again as I had many times before.

While on a church camping trip, I had developed some type of digestive bug and wound up in the hospital for several days. I had been running a fever , diarrhea and was about out of it with IVs and everything. My Mom was visiting me in the afternoon and as she was about to leave the pastor of my church came to visit me.

He was about 60 years old and I had known him since I was in grade school. I remember him and Mom chatting and then she left to do some kind of errand or something. As I said I'm still not clear on this, but I remember him closing the big curtain around my bed. He began to prey and whisper to me about God protecting me or something and thru him I was being healed. I'm sure he slipped his hand under my hospital gown and rubbed his hands across my body and fondled my young breasts.

Like I said, to this day it's all kind of foggy, but I'm sure he came back again the next day and this time he touched me all over and had his hands between my legs and commented something about watching me grow into a beautiful young woman.

After I got well every time he saw me, He'd always give me hugs and be all touchy feely. He had always been like this with the girls, But I started to feel that it was creepy.

Now after twenty years, I'm still haunted by question of "Did this really happen" ?