Finding Out That I Was Gay

My life went like the script of a story. I went to a nice high school, got into a decent college, got married at 28 to a 22 year old virgin. Had two point two kids and lived in the suburbs. The marriage got stale, my wife spent all her free time with church activities and I worked longer and longer hours. Down the hall, in logistics worked Paul who was older divorced guy and single and we started to go down to Lucy's, a strip joint, to have dinner. We sat on the runway looking up at the tits and pussy.

My wife decided that she wanted to take our kids to spend a week with her parents and she left me a casserole and instructions on heating it. She was a good housekeeper so everything was in order, including this dildo I found in her makeup drawer. A dildo, I didn't have any idea she even knew what that was. There was also a tube of KY jelly. I told Paul about that and he asked me if I knew what KY jelly was good for.

Paul suggested that instead of going to Lucy's that we go home and heat up the casserole. He asked me to show him the dildo and the KY jelly and standing in my room he told me that men needed company and he was prepared to spend the night with me. Paul wasn't put off by what came next. He offered to wash the dishes and he was picking up the table and he put his hand on my shoulder and bent down and kissed me, and a second kiss and he ran his hand down over my chest and grabbed my cock and asked me again if I knew what KY jelly was good for.

I will be honest, right then I wasn't sure what to do. I knew what Paul was up to, but I didn't know what to do, did I kick him out. Or did I wait for another kiss. The kiss came as we put the dishes in the dishwasher. It was a long kiss while he ran his hands up and down my back and my behind and pressed me against the kitchen counter. He kissed me with his hand on my cheek and then reached for my cock in my pants while he kissed me. I let him, didn't stop him, I let him kiss me. I wanted him to kiss me.

With a 'man's got to do what a man's got to do' he opened my pants and sat on the kitchen chair and sucked my cock asking me if I liked that. His hand was up around my waist grabbing my butt and my knees were about to give out. He stood up and pulled the shirt out of his pants and pulled his dick out of his zipper. he pushed me down and told me to take a turn and I sucked his dick for long minute. Holding our pants up we walked to the room and he sat me down and took off my shoes and pulled my pants off, he turned me over and stuck his tongue in my crack and rimmed me.

He took the dildo and ran up and down the crack in my ass and took the KY jelly and lubed my hole up and stuck two fingers in me. He ran the dildo up my ass before leaning over me and telling me a 'man has to do what a man has to do' and he got on my back and his dick slipped right in and he fucked me.

I lay on the bed, he sat beside me. What went through my head is that I was such a girl, all along I was letting him decide, he was fucking me, he was kissing me, and that's what I liked about it. He spent the night with me, we slept naked and he had another run at it after midnight. We had cereal for breakfast, put the bowls in the dishwasher and went to work. I sat at my desk realizing that I hadn't fucked my wife in months and that's why she had the dildo. I was gay, a damn queer, a sissy. And I wanted Paul to kiss me.