From Early Teens To Adulthood, A Journey In Sexual Awakening

In the 7th grade I made a new friend. My first visit to her house was eye opening. She told me her mother was a lesbian. Over the couch in the living room was a pubic painting, life seized, nothing left for the imagination. Below the painting, a small plastic plaque, "My Vulva , aka PUSSY".

It was my first confrontation with my sex.

Years later, my friend grew up believing she was a lesbian but is now in a straight relationship. She and I have traveled our sexual awakening together, from nudity, to giving blowjobs to unworthy boys, to lesbian sex with each other. We walked out of college with sexual awareness but sexual immaturity.

We are not lesbians, as much as her mother insists that we are. We are friends, sisters, together, but not lesbians. Reflecting on surrendering to let a guy have sex with us was scary, we weren't old enough. It's not magic, your body wants what it wants, and in our case our bodies want male sex and male authority. Not growing up with a father, we were unprepared for being the woman in the relationship. But we adapted quickly, we just needed to meet that man for us.

I had an art piece painted in college, an open vulva aroused and waiting. It's disguised unless you know what you're looking at. I call it "Deflowering". It's in my bedroom behind the open door of the closet. My husband doesn't like it, but I do. It reminds me of when I was virgin and untouched and unused by a man.

My friend from the 7th grade is my best friend, she married a United pilot and lives in Chicago. We talk about sex all the time, behind our husbands' backs.