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Lesbian Stories
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Lesbian Female / 48
I'm A True Lesbian But Not Out, I Can't See Why I Should Come Out
I made the resolution last year to come out, and failed.
I'm not some sweet college girl, my parents are gone. It's just that after so many years it feels like it's just a waste of time. Who cares, I'm not datable, not some young femme at the lesbian bar. I'm heavy set, following in the women in my family's tradition. I'm bossy, ask my employees or my friends. I've been criticized for being masculine, well I can be, except for the necessary parts. A quick examination will tell you that's what's there is not masculine at all.
When I was a young woman, college age, I had facial hair on my upper lip and on my side burns. Soft hair, but hair. I also had hair around my nipples and of course up my crotch and butt hole. I could take care of the crotch hair with a woman who would wax and bleach, but my facial hair was another problem. I went to a doctor, a hormone doctor and he told me I produced too much testosterone. My wide shoulders and muscle mass came from that (I played softball with the butch lesbians in school, but it bothered me to have hair on my face).
I was a go for it pussy eater in high school (the other lesbians on the team) but when it came to them I was too hairy for them. I shaved but it's not like a wax job, I went off to college and I hung around with a butch Lisa who was a Biology major. We went out together looking for girls and she's the one that got me to wax, so I did. Also getting the bleached butthole, I've been doing it since. It was a time when hunting was successful, lots of girls questioning if they are lesbians. Some were, some weren't. I was at my most butch then.
My doctor put me on a regimen to reduce the effects of the testosterone and my tits got full and my periods made my dead week hell for me. He told me that if I got pregnant that would have the same effect. But that seemed like a big price to pay. But my facial hair diminished and what's there is soft blonde. I blame the hormone treatment for turning away any butch sentiments. Gone are the days of enjoying the hunt. My friend Lisa saw it all.
The older I get, as my natural hormones have diminished, I'm more and more soft. I now wear women's clothes exclusively and I like earrings and necklaces. I've been seen out in earrings and a purse. A far cry from the days I exclusively wore pants. I need to be made love to now, I want to be the one dated, not looking for a date. I've not crossed over but I have thought about it, what if I let a man make love to me? My pussy is totally virgin when it comes to men.
As to declaring or coming out, why? Sure it would help with the identities, I could get a lesbian tattoo or wear a lesbian lapel pin. But that's not me. I want a long bath, a woman giving me a massage, a woman pleasuring me with her hands and lips, a woman's kiss. I'll cook, I can do that pretty well. We can go shopping together. I want a woman in a dress, with soft cheeks and big bust. I want a woman who can tease me with her breasts, feed me her nipples, make love to me. I need a woman in my life.
Coming out seems such a waste. I think I'll close the closet door.
I'm not some sweet college girl, my parents are gone. It's just that after so many years it feels like it's just a waste of time. Who cares, I'm not datable, not some young femme at the lesbian bar. I'm heavy set, following in the women in my family's tradition. I'm bossy, ask my employees or my friends. I've been criticized for being masculine, well I can be, except for the necessary parts. A quick examination will tell you that's what's there is not masculine at all.
When I was a young woman, college age, I had facial hair on my upper lip and on my side burns. Soft hair, but hair. I also had hair around my nipples and of course up my crotch and butt hole. I could take care of the crotch hair with a woman who would wax and bleach, but my facial hair was another problem. I went to a doctor, a hormone doctor and he told me I produced too much testosterone. My wide shoulders and muscle mass came from that (I played softball with the butch lesbians in school, but it bothered me to have hair on my face).
I was a go for it pussy eater in high school (the other lesbians on the team) but when it came to them I was too hairy for them. I shaved but it's not like a wax job, I went off to college and I hung around with a butch Lisa who was a Biology major. We went out together looking for girls and she's the one that got me to wax, so I did. Also getting the bleached butthole, I've been doing it since. It was a time when hunting was successful, lots of girls questioning if they are lesbians. Some were, some weren't. I was at my most butch then.
My doctor put me on a regimen to reduce the effects of the testosterone and my tits got full and my periods made my dead week hell for me. He told me that if I got pregnant that would have the same effect. But that seemed like a big price to pay. But my facial hair diminished and what's there is soft blonde. I blame the hormone treatment for turning away any butch sentiments. Gone are the days of enjoying the hunt. My friend Lisa saw it all.
The older I get, as my natural hormones have diminished, I'm more and more soft. I now wear women's clothes exclusively and I like earrings and necklaces. I've been seen out in earrings and a purse. A far cry from the days I exclusively wore pants. I need to be made love to now, I want to be the one dated, not looking for a date. I've not crossed over but I have thought about it, what if I let a man make love to me? My pussy is totally virgin when it comes to men.
As to declaring or coming out, why? Sure it would help with the identities, I could get a lesbian tattoo or wear a lesbian lapel pin. But that's not me. I want a long bath, a woman giving me a massage, a woman pleasuring me with her hands and lips, a woman's kiss. I'll cook, I can do that pretty well. We can go shopping together. I want a woman in a dress, with soft cheeks and big bust. I want a woman who can tease me with her breasts, feed me her nipples, make love to me. I need a woman in my life.
Coming out seems such a waste. I think I'll close the closet door.
