The Cross Dressing Doctor

I masturbate with my best friends fiancé’s dirty panties
Some time within the last year I was visiting a friend and his fiancé who I have known for years. I’ve had a huge crush on his fiancé forever and just lost control one day,While using their bathroom I noticed a dirty pair of her underwear laying in the hamper and was immediately turned on, I picked them up and saw the crotch was soaked in white creamy discharge and smelled and tasted what came out of her and literally got goosebumps, the smell and taste and thought of the discharge literally coming from inside her vagina made me feel like an animal. I grabbed some lotion from inside a cabinet and made myself cum while smelling, licking, and sucking on the crotch of her panties. The whole time she and my friends were right outside the door. Now every time I go over I do the same thing if she leaves any dirty panties in the bathroom. I feel bad but I want her more than anything and it’s killing me but at the same time I love both my friend and her. I know this is totally crazy I just had to get it off my chest