Lesbian Female / 26
Living Between Two Worlds, A Husband And My Lesbian Lover
I came of age (18) in 2018. As the youngest child I lived at home with my mother as my parents were divorced. My two older sisters were out of the house on their own, one was getting married that summer. I had been harboring a secret, I was a lesbian and I couldn't wait to get away to college.
I applied for and was accepted to a small college in upstate New York, in state but too far to come home on weekends. In college I met and became sexually involved with an older girl from Connecticut. I suppose she was a dyke, I had not really met a dyke up till then. It was sex and more sex and more sex, she couldn't keep her hands off of me and I couldn't be close to her without wanting to be held, touched, manhandled, eaten out. Two peas in a pod. Her first unvarnished sexual affair, and it was the same for me.
I told my middle sister and she took it really bad, but kept my secret from my mother. The following summer I went home, and being separated from Christine was impossible. I spent all my time on the phone or texting, it was all sexual and I shared sexual pictures with her and she shared sexual pictures with me. My phone had become a time bomb. I used the family PIN on it. And that's how my mother found out, reading all those sexually explicit text threads, and seeing the pictures I kept on it. That's when she confronted me and I told me I wasn't going back to that school, I was staying home and working for the family business.
When COVID came about it was terrible when our business had to shut. It didn't matter how much help we were getting, we had to lay off the staff and shut the business down, that my grandparents had started when they were first married. I was still getting over my loss of Christine when a man friend of my mother's came into my life. He was divorced with two children in their pre teens and my mother told me I had an opportunity staring me in the face. He needed a wife desperately and I was it, single and available and I was young and I could have children for him. He was encouraged, I'm sure of that. He had nothing against taking a 20 year old girl as a wife to take care of his children.
And it wasn't enough for me to take care of his children, not when I could have more children for him. I kept myself from getting pregnant, but it put a real strain on what was a very bad situation. It was then that Christine came back into my life. I ran away from my marriage, to Connecticut with Christine. She had finished college and had a good job and I went to live with her. It was the Fall of 2018 all over again, unabashed sex, she has a very high sex drive and I respond to it with an equally strong desire. Pent up sex, sex with my husband was one sided.
After a year guilt overwhelmed me. I had abandoned my marriage, my stepchildren called to me. I told Christine I had to go back to my marriage, I needed to go back and get pregnant. I wanted to get pregnant. I wanted to go back to my husband. My husband did not waste a single day in getting me pregnant, I had a baby in 2022 and another in 2023. My step kids are now both 'teens' and they have fun introducing me as their mother. They tell their friends I had them when I was very young.
I miss Christine and we stay in daily contact. My husband knows, I learned my lesson about keeping secrets. Friends at a distance, with very sexually charged texts and pictures. I have a secret PIN, I learned that lesson too. He doesn't need to see those pictures or read those steamy texts. Anyway, she can't get me pregnant, but if she could she would, she's told me that many, many times and that's what makes her jealous. In my dreams, she was between my legs when I got pregnant. I don't tell that to my husband.
She is coming to visit, to meet my husband and my step children and my children. My mother and my sisters. We are stepping through a portal, for everyone's well being everything has to be out in the open.
I applied for and was accepted to a small college in upstate New York, in state but too far to come home on weekends. In college I met and became sexually involved with an older girl from Connecticut. I suppose she was a dyke, I had not really met a dyke up till then. It was sex and more sex and more sex, she couldn't keep her hands off of me and I couldn't be close to her without wanting to be held, touched, manhandled, eaten out. Two peas in a pod. Her first unvarnished sexual affair, and it was the same for me.
I told my middle sister and she took it really bad, but kept my secret from my mother. The following summer I went home, and being separated from Christine was impossible. I spent all my time on the phone or texting, it was all sexual and I shared sexual pictures with her and she shared sexual pictures with me. My phone had become a time bomb. I used the family PIN on it. And that's how my mother found out, reading all those sexually explicit text threads, and seeing the pictures I kept on it. That's when she confronted me and I told me I wasn't going back to that school, I was staying home and working for the family business.
When COVID came about it was terrible when our business had to shut. It didn't matter how much help we were getting, we had to lay off the staff and shut the business down, that my grandparents had started when they were first married. I was still getting over my loss of Christine when a man friend of my mother's came into my life. He was divorced with two children in their pre teens and my mother told me I had an opportunity staring me in the face. He needed a wife desperately and I was it, single and available and I was young and I could have children for him. He was encouraged, I'm sure of that. He had nothing against taking a 20 year old girl as a wife to take care of his children.
And it wasn't enough for me to take care of his children, not when I could have more children for him. I kept myself from getting pregnant, but it put a real strain on what was a very bad situation. It was then that Christine came back into my life. I ran away from my marriage, to Connecticut with Christine. She had finished college and had a good job and I went to live with her. It was the Fall of 2018 all over again, unabashed sex, she has a very high sex drive and I respond to it with an equally strong desire. Pent up sex, sex with my husband was one sided.
After a year guilt overwhelmed me. I had abandoned my marriage, my stepchildren called to me. I told Christine I had to go back to my marriage, I needed to go back and get pregnant. I wanted to get pregnant. I wanted to go back to my husband. My husband did not waste a single day in getting me pregnant, I had a baby in 2022 and another in 2023. My step kids are now both 'teens' and they have fun introducing me as their mother. They tell their friends I had them when I was very young.
I miss Christine and we stay in daily contact. My husband knows, I learned my lesson about keeping secrets. Friends at a distance, with very sexually charged texts and pictures. I have a secret PIN, I learned that lesson too. He doesn't need to see those pictures or read those steamy texts. Anyway, she can't get me pregnant, but if she could she would, she's told me that many, many times and that's what makes her jealous. In my dreams, she was between my legs when I got pregnant. I don't tell that to my husband.
She is coming to visit, to meet my husband and my step children and my children. My mother and my sisters. We are stepping through a portal, for everyone's well being everything has to be out in the open.
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