Lesbian Female / 35
Held Back By My Culture
In college I lived in an off campus dorm with three other women. None of us knew each other until we moved in. Of the four of us I was the biggest prude. While the other girls seemed to have no shame, I was reserved. I was stripped down to nothing one night by the three of them and they all had oral sex with me. Seems they were fed up with me.
That night they used a pocket camera to take pictures of us, everyone naked and engaged in sex acts, including my head held between the other girls' legs. My father got copies of these pictures, and he was threatened with exposing me as a lesbian. He paid.
In my father's eyes I was a lesbian and I was kept at a distance. From time to time he got another picture in the mail. Some he destroyed, but others exist till this day. To any casual observer it is obvious I wasn't participating, but not to him. Pictures of his number one daughter naked in a sex party with other women was unbearable to him.
In my mid thirties I was at the house of a coworker, a lawyer, and she leaned over to me and whispered that she liked girls, and that she liked me. Not wishing to offend me. I told her about my one time with the other girls in my dorm suite. Did I like it, be honest. I ended up in the bathtub with her, and then on her bed. This time I willingly gave myself to her. And we gave herself to me, I willingly took her.
I am never at ease, always feel guilty with my father. If he finds out, I will be disinherited.
That night they used a pocket camera to take pictures of us, everyone naked and engaged in sex acts, including my head held between the other girls' legs. My father got copies of these pictures, and he was threatened with exposing me as a lesbian. He paid.
In my father's eyes I was a lesbian and I was kept at a distance. From time to time he got another picture in the mail. Some he destroyed, but others exist till this day. To any casual observer it is obvious I wasn't participating, but not to him. Pictures of his number one daughter naked in a sex party with other women was unbearable to him.
In my mid thirties I was at the house of a coworker, a lawyer, and she leaned over to me and whispered that she liked girls, and that she liked me. Not wishing to offend me. I told her about my one time with the other girls in my dorm suite. Did I like it, be honest. I ended up in the bathtub with her, and then on her bed. This time I willingly gave myself to her. And we gave herself to me, I willingly took her.
I am never at ease, always feel guilty with my father. If he finds out, I will be disinherited.
