Spanking Myself

i was in a relationship for about a year and a half and my partner loved to spank me. he sometimes spanked me for hours on end and i would lay there watching whatever movie we put on. the last time he did it before i left him, i couldnt even make out any words because of how much it hurt.

so it’s been half a year since i left him and i am so much happier. i haven’t had sex since breaking up with him and i frankly love it and im pretty sure im asexual. the other day though while at a bar, i made out with this guy and he started grabbing and lightly smacking my ass. i don’t like sex, but i do like being touched, and for the first time since leaving my ex, a man made me wet.

a few days later, i started thinking about how getting spanked was one of the only parts of sex with my ex that i liked. then when this guy at the bar was playing with my ass i got wet. i still masturbate despite not loving it, and since spanking was at the forefront of my mind, i grabbed a hairbrush and spanked myself, gently at first, then harder. my ass was so red after and it felt so good that i did it to myself, but i also feel so guilty for it. i feel like that’s something i should leave for someone to do to me.

either way though, i’ve found a new way to masturbate