Pay Attention To National News

Back in the UK, I locked myself up in my horrendously expensive rubber bondage-bag, after mailing the keys to my address, and waited for my wife to get home from work...when she arrived, she was tired, and in a pissy mood..."You can get out of that NOW, asshole - I have work for you that I need doing right NOW!" she said, irritation very noticeable. When I made my normal 'mmmmmfff' sound with the zipper closed at my mouth, she jerked it open, saying "not in the mood! Unlock yourself NOW!

When I confessed what I had done, she let out a scream of mixed laughter, contempt, and enjoyment..."Oh you fucking idiot! Don't you ever watch the news or read the paper? The Post Office has just gone on strike! God knows when there will be deliveries! So, settle down and get ready for what may be a VERY long wait! And I don't want your excuses - you fucked up, mister and if you think I'm cutting you out of there, after you spent all that money we really don't have, on that fucking bag, you're sadly mistaken!" With that she sealed me back into muffled incoherent near-silence again, and left, saying "I'm going to see my mother! This will kill her - she's never thought you even had a brain! She'll be delighted to discover how right she was! In fact I think I'll bring her back here, to give her a good laugh! She'll just say 'serve the pervert right!' and we'll get drunk on cheap wine, and delivery junk...So settle down, and have a nice long wank! That's gonna be your sole source of entertainment, until the strike settles!"

She did actually take fairly good care of me, even persuading her Mom to live with us for as long as it took, at which giggled a lot and said "Righto ...I'm gonna LOVE this!"

Luckily it settled in two weeks, rather than the usual two or three months, so I got off relatively easy...a sick part of me hoped it WOULD take months... they've never let me forget that, to this day!