Destroyed Friendship

I confess that I turned into my best friends fucktoy after his girlfriend broke up with him.

I always had a crush on him and he knows about. He was sexually depressed and I helped him out a little bit by giving him some blowjobs. From time to time he get more aggressive, make me gag or slapped my face.
After a few weeks doing that, he fucked me for the first time ever. It was the biggest cock I’ve even had (almost 8 inch) and he was very rough. Choked me from behind when he fucked me, spit on my face and pulls my hair.

We only meet when he was horny or frustrated and need a relief.
He don’t talked to me when we saw each other outside. I realized our friendship is broken and I’m just an object to him. To be honest I like it. I like how rough he is but sometimes I wish the friendship back.