This Could Change

I have always considered myself to be straight except for a brief time back in jr high when this boy in my class and in went down to this wooded area one day on the way home from school and we tried to suck each others dicks.
To be honest with you once we did it I liked it and it felt very good and we did it every day after school for a couple of weeks. We found this one spot very secluded and private so we would get naked in the woods there and suck each others dicks and one day I was sucking his dick so good I couldn’t stop and let him hold onto my head and cum in my mouth and it was easy to just swallow it
After that he tried to swallow my cum and he liked it too. It made sucking dick even better if we swallowed the cum. He went to school there several
Months and he and I were always sucking each other off. When he moved away I missed sucking hid dick so I started jacking off a lot more and I would cum in my hand and eat my own cum.
Now here I am
Many years later and I find myself wanting to suck on a big hard cock and taste another man’s cum again. I am
Married and we have children and when I have time to myself I am watching gay porn and jacking off and now it’s even worse I am hooked on gay anal and have been using different things to experiment with in my ass. I have been fucking myself for over a year now and the things I am using are getting bigger and bigger and I want to find a hung man that will fuck me and I want to feel him cum inside of me.
I can’t believe I am
Having thoughts like this but I am and I really want to experience a big cock up my ass I get off so hard watching men have sec with other men I really get into 3 way man sex two
Men fucking the same guy one in his ass one in his mouth. I want to be the man
In the middle so bad. I think about a very private discrete hotel
Meeting with two nice clean fit very well hung men and both of them using my mouth and ass for hours and having a lot of cum inside of me. I am sitting in my truck in traffic right now typing this and my cock is rock hard and dripping pre cum and I am not even touching it.
I am going to find a spot to pull over in private to jack off and eat the cum out of my hand I am so fucking hot for a big cock up my ass.
I want to but dildos but don’t have any place to hide them but I would love to have a few toys to use.
Any other married men out there have similar urges like this. I am almost to the point of desperation.