I Wasn't Quite Swept Off My Feet, I Slipped On A Banana Peel

I feel like I was a child bride. Certainly I wasn't ready, had no idea what I was getting into, and had no idea what I was supposed to do. I was 18, a college freshman, delusional about being free, I got screwed and got pregnant, and six weeks later I was married.

My husband 'had to finish raising me'. He 'had to put up with me'. 'Had to teach me how to run a house and raise a child'. I'm sick and tired of hearing that. I was PREGNANT by a guy I didn't even know, and wham, I'm married. He wants, deserves, a wife who knows how to cook. He wants a wife who can manage the money. He wants a wife who can iron. And a wife who knows how to have babies. I could hardly wipe my ass. Sorry.

I have learned how to cook, iron, shop, balance the bank statement, breast feed, wash clothes, and make him happy in bed. I had to grow up early, be a woman when I was a girl. I never had the college lifestyle, I was washing dishes. I am a damn good wife in record time.

And, I will get pregnant again when this one is out of diapers. I'll be the youngest ever wife, mother and homemaker. And let me add this, he has it easy, he got a wife, I got a husband and a child. Big difference, if I had a wife I would be happy. How about it, get me a wife for me and I will stop complaining.