I Want To Be Used

I'm finally accepting the fact that I want to be someone's slut. I didn't really put all the pieces together until i did research on BDSM but I have such a desire to get choked, slapped by a guy and made to say "thank you" for it. I want to be edged til i'm crying and then finish over and over til i can't take it anymore. I want to be bent over his knee and spanked relentlessly and suck him off while he pets me and praises me. Fucked so hard and told i'm a good girl and that i can and will take what ever he gives me. I want to be cummed in over and over and be told how pretty i look with his cum dripping out of me. I just want to be a toy and have him do whatever he wants. I want to be cared for. I want to serve. I've never been into age gaps but l need them to act older, tell me what's good for me and baby me. I desire it so badly and it messes with my brain daily. I've never told anyone and i'm so embarrassed. I don’t even know how to bring it up in a future relationship but i don't think i could live without it