One Day, I Woke Up.

No one cares anymore if you are loose girl or not. When I was a teen being loose was a very bad thing. You kept yourself as pure as the driven snow, except maybe a feel here or there. I dated in a group, as did all my friends. That kept temptation away from the door. For Junior Prom I went out with Alan, an 11th grader. He drove. Back at my house before curfew he asked me for a goodnight kiss. He wanted a kiss on the point of his dick.

It was a very quick kiss.

But after that I didn't think that was so bad. Of course I never told anyone that I had kissed Alan's dick but Alan made it sound like I spent an hour on his dick when he told his friends. I had become a 'slut'. The more you deny it, the bigger the slut. Some girls of my age asked me what it was like. Is it true that he can pee in your mouth? Overnight I was the expert, and I told them that no he doesn't pee in your mouth. But later I learned that some girls had a very different experience, the guy peed in the their mouth (it literally took me until college to learn that the guy had not peed, he had cum in their mouth).

I was showing myself to a friend at her house. At that age we compared how our privates looked. She had a really full vulva, meaty vulva, it was bigger than my hand. Spread out to eat, she had a very juicy vulva, she was so wet. I on the other hand have a small vulva, and she had to hold my legs apart and stick her finger up my ass for me to get wet. But when it comes to eating, you don't really care once that pussy is wet and juicy and you get over all the hair.

On one occasion, she stuck her thumb up my butt. "Does that feel good?" I said yes, but it really felt weird. "Are you going to let your husband fuck you that way". NO WAY. I ate pussy all through high school and college. My kind of pussy was luscious, meaty and wet. If I didn't come up for air with wet pussy all over my face, well then she wasn't worth eating. Some girls size up other girls by their tits, I sized up girls by their cameltoes.

By the time I went to work, I had had several girl relationships. But never a guy. I wanted to know what that was like. I thought long and hard about it. I talked to girls that had tried it, and got mixed reviews. Most girls said ONCE is enough. That's what girlfriends are for. Other said "I don't care" "if he wants to fuck, I let him fuck". But all the girls had girlfriends, the girls that I hung out with at that time.

I was set up with a guy. It was on purpose, he had been briefed, it was purely to get me over the hump. It was 'clinical', dick in, and dick out. He took it differently, and he got his dick in me alright, his dick went in my ass. All the way in and he came like that. It was ok, I guess, but not something I would be doing again. Me and my girlfriend talked about it a lot. What if, for instance, you were eating pussy, and he fucked you up the ass?

He didn't. He fucked me up the vagina and came in me like that. Yes, he was an asshole. No I wasn't prepared for that. Yes I did get pregnant from it. I didn't go in for an abortion, but I had a miscarriage at 13 weeks. I never in my life cried so much.

I live with Alan, remember him? He is a psychiatrist now. I 'suck' his dick now, and he gets me pregnant. Because of my past, he has a practice specializing with girls who have identity issues and lean towards girl fantasies. Yes, most of those girls outgrow it by the time they get to college. The few that don't have life long issues of many sorts, he says it's a form of dependency syndrome, needing the validation of their therapist. He doesn't treat them, they don't need a psychiatrist, he sends them to a licensed listener therapist. A few actually do alright.

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