I Live In A Fantasy World, I Love Him, I Love Her, I'm The Babysitter

I got plastered drunk, and probably spiked. I was unresponsive, but not unconscious. Someone, a man carried me out, put me in a car and I woke up very hungover, in a puked bed, naked in my bed. I was advised out of caution to use the morning after p!ll , I didn't. I was pregnant. I left town and returned to my parents to have the baby. A daughter.

22, no real job skills, a single mother living with my parents. I worked as a cashier clerk in a bank.

That's where I got to know a man who kept large balances in several accounts. Some millions, others hundreds of thousands, a couple two or three thousand. We aren't supposed to snoop, but I did. I smiled, a lot. I actually began to think I was in love with him. Puppy love, fantasizing about him. I had his address, drove to his house. I saw a woman leave, with two kids in the back seat. Talk about a cold shower.

I asked him about kids, I showed him a picture of my daughter. He smiled at me.

I'm 27 he has 'befriended' me. I work for him now. He's a real estate man. I babysit for his wife. I dream of being her, until I see myself in the mirror. She was a county fair queen in high school, a college cheerleader, the wife of a rich man. I think sometimes I'm in love with her, more than I am in love with him.