I'm So Frustrated I Hurt Inside

I have strong feelings for a girl that works with me. We are gym workout friends, we have early morning routine, she is so fit and I'm getting fit for her. We shower together and show off to each other. I've let her wash me down there with her hand and wash my titties. I love being touched by her. She claims to be straight as an arrow except for how she feels about me.

I want to kiss her but she stands back when I try. She says kissing will ruing things between us. We are gym friends and she does like to touch me and likes to touch my titties but that's where she draws the line. If she lets me touch her then it will ruing things.

All I get is to enjoy her woman form, I'm welcome to look at her.