if you really feel that this happend, then ASK THE DOCTOR. maybe sexual stimulation can help the vaginal muscles push the baby out. Im not a doctor, but its just a guess. That would not be something that I just "swept under the rug". We are talking about your dignity here. Ask the doctor and nurses that were there. That really just doesnt seem right. I had an epidural with both of my kids, so I wouldn't have known if a doctor ever tried that with me, but Ive never heard of anything like that before. Good luck to you and congrats on your new baby.
Ina May Gaskin (wellknown midwife) said in her book, "I have never observed even the slightest laceration in a woman who used clitoral stimulation as a relaxation method during birth. Clitoral stimulation seems to increase vaginal engorgement as the baby emerges."
So it seems that women do use this as a relaxation technique and if it happened, then perhaps that what the doctor was trying to do.
I think you're fretting over nothing.
Congratulations!
I think its okay to ask. Just knowing if its something they "might" do wont be enough. And honestly since you went natural you should have been informed he would do this.
Ask, get an answer. So you can rest your mind.