3 Hail Mary's And An Act Of Contrition!

I'm Roman Catholic, not a good one I admit and if God was picking a team I wouldn't make the subs bench.
I am too easily led as a teenager and as an adult.
I go to church religiously but if I am honest I am not that religious.

I am in a hopeless, sexless marriage and I am not exaggerating that when I say that if I wanked my husband off then my hand could completely hide his cock.
His size and lack of interest I just got used to. He is a lovely man but has loads of interests all of don't involve me not because he doesn't want me but because his interests are different and time consuming, birdwatching, golf, cribbage. Me I see my sister and I am on the rota to put flowers in our church.

Literally I was awakened last weekend when our son Kai not even 20 yet, was soaked my my younger nephew Kai was in sports shorts, just eating and drinking and having fun. His chest was bare, hes well toned but I was just proud of him not attracted to him. However after my nephew turned the hose on Kai his shorts were wet through and the outline of his cock was impressive im talking 6-8 inches of semi hard cock. Kai took it in good fun and I tried to put the size of my sons cock out of my mind but couldn't. My sister who was there noticed it too. I admit I am easily encouraged and when my sister told me to look at Love Honey on the web, it wasn't along before I was watching pornhub especially young fit adults. Normally I use the web for recipes and finding with flower best compliments an Ox-eye Daisy.
I needed to confess and I did on here, I was so surprised that people commented and then told me to go and fuck my own son , I tried to ignore these comments but on Thursday or was it Friday my mind is a blur, after my husband left chasing some migrant geese, I went to my sons room and ended up seducing him.
I was fucked about six times , had cum all over me been licked all over and even let him play with my back hole, which hasn't been touched since convent days.

Anyway our son says we have to be careful he doesn't want to hurt his father and this would crush him, but he warned me that friends wouldn't understand, I asked about my sister Cathy and he assured me she needs to be involved if we tell her so she's not got anything on us.
To conclude I went to confession yesterday evening, not locally of course.
The priest was great unbelievably he said I must not do it ! and having children would be so difficult but its been happening for years in nany cultures. He asked me to judge what my husband would say if I asked him to be more responsive in bed and I said I wouldn't dare, its always on his terms. And has not happened for years .
He sighed and said if you love someone then please when he goes to university find a different way. Perhaps your husband has he said.
I wasn't listening to what my penance was, I was trying ti get my head around this bizarre conversation which sounded more like relationship counselling than a Confession, I cant remember the prayer but it hardly fitted the crime.
The visiting parish priest has opened my mind and now I am going to open my legs and mouth wide.