Is it wrong? When I was very young, and guided by physical desire, I married a boy. Yes, he was a boy then, and is a boy today. He just cannot grow up.

I have know this man through work, he is much older than I, but he is everything that one thinks about in a man. I work for him, or as he says with him. I love him. I mean I truly love him. In my heart I am his woman. We spend 12 hours a day together, take our lunches together, there is no barrier between us, we talk about everything, we share our meals, I cry on his shoulder, he confides in me entirely, when we are together people think of us a husband and wife.

And, he loves me. He calls me 'woman' or 'honey' or anything else that comes to mind, and I respond. I call him by my pet name for him as well. We don't hide anything from anyone at the office (he owns the business). Everyone, I mean everyone, knows that I belong to him. Except for that boy that I married who is blind as a bat.

My religion is 100% against divorce and 100% against infidelity. But I feel that I am unfaithful to the man I love, evertime I have to let that boy touch me. I really just crinmge when my husband touches me anymore. We live together and at church hold up an image, but at home I am no longer his wife. I belong to another man.

Yes, I have delivered myself to the man I love. That first time he took me to be his woman, and I knew instantly the difference between a man and a boy. The boy just can't compete.

If I leave this boy, will God forgive me. I wasn't really a woman when I married him, just a stupid girl.