my best friend ash and i have known each other for a long time now, recently her fiance died and shes at the point where she can start looking forward to the rest of her life.

im deeply in love with her and when she speaks of guys she wants to be with i wonder "why not me?"

any time the subject of "us" comes up she laughes it off but im devastated she wont notice me "like that"

her mothers told her she can tell im in love with her by the way i look at her but still she laughes it off.

what can i do? if she doesnt want me then she doesnt want me, ive never felt like this about anybody.