Who doesn't have an Uncle Bubba, with the beer belly and obnoxious belching, or the Aunt Petunia with the bright red lipstick and too-tight pants? We all have at least one person in the family tree we'd all wish would be plucked. If your relatives would make a good comedy routine, then we want to hear about them. This category is for all those stories about loud aunts, drunk brothers, flatulent uncles, and slutty sisters.

My Aunt

When I was 16 I went to stay with my uncle and aunt for a while. Aunt Pam was 40 and drove a head start bus. She was kinda plain looking but pretty. Not alot of makeup just what you see is what you get type. Uncle worked out of town alot so her and I had alot of alone time. I was young and needed money so she offered me to go on the bus route with her to pick up and drop off the kids. If I helped her she could give me a few bucks and buy my smokes so of course I was all for it. Our daily routes were always the same and I had become familiar with all the stops. We would talk and get coffee and just enjoy the day. She told me that her and my uncle fight and argue about everything. She would tell me how unhappy she was but would never think of divorce. We finished our route one day and went back home. She always took a shower after the morning route and then we ran the second route. After she came out of the bathroom i went in to pee and noticed her panties on the floor with her towel. I didn't have a girlfriend and i had been staying there for a few weeks now. I picked the panties up and sniffed the crotch. She smelled like heaven! I masturbated and came all over the crotch of her panties! This became a regular thing about three times a week I would fill her dirty panties with cum then hide them in the dirty clothes to be washed. After 3-4 months we were on our second route and had dropped off the last kid. We were on our way home and she said she wanted to show me a little river where she liked to sit and think sometimes. We drove out even further into the country of our small little town. We pulled into a secluded area right along the waterway where no traffic would be. I said it's beautiful and started to say something else but she just put her finger to my lios for me to be quiet. She got right in my face and said I know what you do to my panties and it makes me wet constantly! She said i rarely see your uncle and when I do we argue. She said to have a young man just over my panties like that makes me horny! She said its been a while since I have been touched. With that I nervously took my chance. I kissed her and kissed her neck. Unbuttoned her pants and took off her shirt and bra. We went to the back of the bus and it was like being in heat! Kissing and pulling clothes off. I pushed her down in an empty seat and buried my face in her pussy. I licked and sucked her clit until she was pinching her own nipples. I pulled her forward and spread her legs wide. Im not hung like a horse but I gave her all eight thick inches. She was tight and so wet. I started pumping in and out of her, watching her chest rise and her eyes roll back. She didn't get loud she just said fuck me good! I pounded her with everything I had. She looked at me and said cum in my mouth? That's all I could take! My cock throbbed and bucked and emptied my balls as deep as I could inside her! She held me close and tight as I emptied, then she looked at me and said you cheated! Softly smacking me. We got our composure and headed home. On the way she said that was a great fuck but if you don't play fair you don't get to play! Our "sessions" continued until I joined the service 2 years later and yes I started pulling out lol. Now that I'm older she didn't fuck me for love or an affair. She fucked me because she wasn't being satisfied, she needed the attention she wasn't getting. I guess she didn't get it after I left either because they did divorce in their 60s!

  • Cousin Cris

    I was 14 and about to turn 15 when my cousin Cris came to stay the weekend like she had many times. We had been "kissing cousins" for a few years. She had tought me to French kiss as she was 2 years older than me. We had never done anything really sexual other than kissing and some touching through clothes. Saturday rolled around and I turned 15. It was a normal birthday and after the cake everyone went on their way. My mom and dad went to bed and Cris and myself stayed up to watch TV. After a little bit I was laying on the couch and she was in the floor beside me. She would move her blanket over so I could see her ass in yellow panties. We were laying opposite directions so I was getting a great view! She said "you can touch it if you want to" so I started rubbing her ass cheeks and my young cock started to throb! After a while I was running my finger under the elastic bands of her panties and could feel the heat from her crotch. She spread her legs a little and i slid my finger inside her for the first time. She raised her ass a little, turned her head and closed her eyes. I started pushing my finger in and out. She was so wet and I was rock hard. She pushed my hand away and walked over to shut off all the lights but left the TV on. Mom and dad were upstairs asleep so we would easily hear them if they were to get up. She walked back to the couch and knelt down beside me. We kissed a few times and she told me she was going to give me a hand job! She pulled my cock out and started stroking me slowly but hard. Grabbing at the head and loosening her grip on the way down. She said it felt more like a pussy! I was like "how do you know?" She said I'm not a virgin! She lay her head on my stomach and continued stroking. You have a nice thick cock she said as she stroked. I slid my hand back to her panties and started rubbing her pussy again. She was breathing heavy and I could feel her hot breath on my cock head. I pulled my hand to my nose and inhaled the first smell of pussy in my life! My god she smelled great! She pushed my hand back to her pussy and I felt her tongue lick the top of my cock! I almost came right then! Then her lios wrapped around the shaft and she took me into her mouth. At that young age I was thinking damn she's messy but... don't stop! Lol. She kept sniffling and telling me i had alot of pre cum. I stopped her head bobbing and asked if I could put it in? She thought for a minute and asked if I had a condom which i did not! She said all this pre cum it's too risky. She said I've got a better idea. I said let me taste your pussy first? She straddled my face and I licked everywhere she told me too! Then she squatted over my cock and started riding with it between her pussy lips but not inside her. Five minutes of this and I was squirtting cum all over my belly and chest. We finished, cleaned up and it was over. A few weeks later I did get to fuck her with a condom and years later after kids, divorces and tube's being tied i shot my load inside her several times! We are not in love and we have our own lives to live we've just always enjoyed fucking each other!

    Easier To Show You

    Being a 20 yr old that looks like a younger twink is not east to explain to your 70ish grandfather. It was easier to show him what I’m good at, and I think he liked it. He told me not to say anything to grandma, and would be willing to help me with college expenses if I “keep in touch” with him. Great deal if you asked me.

  • Mom And Me

    My confession is me and my mom have sex every now and again. Started few years back. Long story short, we talked about it, she came over my apartment one day. Took a shower then came out naked. We had sex. I've never used a condom and either finish inside her or on her face. We can't seem stop. There's some beyond normal physical attraction there...I'm 30 and she's 55

    Mom Drunk Kissed Me With Tongue

    I was 15 and dad was out of town on one of his many weekend golf trips.
    Mom's friend, Kelly's, divorce was final so a group of friends decided go to a dance hall after work to celebrate. Mom called to tell me her plans and hit the fridge for dinner. Normally, my mom's not into that stuff but Kelly begged so my mom agreed.
    Later on, I got a call from one of mom's friends asking if I'd be home because she had a little too much, one of her friend's was driving her car home and they'd need help getting her in the house.
    I helped get her inside and sat her in dad's recliner in living room with instructions to keep her head elevated and something near by if she vomits. After a few hours, she'll be ready for bed or she can sleep it off there. Just make sure she doesn't get up and fall into something.
    I found a movie and stayed with her until she woke up and said she had to pee. I helped her to the bathroom and she pulled her skirt up to her waist, took off her panties and tossed them in the laundry basket. I got a clear view of her trimmed black bush. She sat and peed a lot. She was not balanced to I helped keep her straight. I handed her some toilet paper to wipe and helped her stand up. She pulled down her skirt and told me she was ready for bed. I was helping her down the hallway when she slammed me into the wall and started kissing me with tongue.
    I admit allowing the moment last longer than I should because I was already hard from seeing her bush and I was getting tongue.
    I helped her to bed and she said, "FUCK ME!"
    I wish I could say I took her up on her request but I didn't.
    I got her comfortable and stayed until she was out cold. Which was only a few minutes.
    The next morning, she woke up with a hang over and asked what happened. I told her and even the 'FUCK ME' comment.
    She was embarrassed but we promised to keep it our secret.

  • Incest Changed My Life And Now I'm Marrying My Daughter

    Kids and career took a toll on my marriage.

    But my daughter, 22, is blossoming into a beautiful woman.

    She knew I was lonely. She gave me what I needed, what my wife hadn't given me
    in years.

    We have fallen in love and it's not something we have any control over.

    As soon as my divorce is finalized, my daughter and I can move to a new town and live openly as couple.

    The First Time

    When my mom came home very drunk and horny one night I was sixteen, she actually woke me up singing as she came into my room at like two am and started dancing around stripping off her clothes and throwing them at me. I was thinking Holy Hell what is going on at first but then just smiled and watched her, when her bra came off I was really amazed, tore her nylons falling down and laid there laughing her ass off for a minute.
    I got up and started tickling her while leaning over, was playing with her breasts and nipples also, helped her get the nylons the rest of the way off then her underwear. I got her sitting up and she put her legs under herself and was kneeling there and just said I want to see you cock. Her eyes were not even focusing and she had a permanent smile going, I found out the next day that she also took some stuff at the party with her friend.
    she sucked on me like crazy, my first ever blow job and I was really enjoying it, I not realizing it gagged her a few times sort of pushing into her when she sucked. She told me to just stand still because it sort of hurt doing that so I stood still because it felt so good. She kept sucking and I came watching her swallow it down and seemed to enjoy it.
    When I finished I still wanted to play around with her, got her up on my bed running my hands all over her and started licking and sucking her nipples, she asked me to lick her pussy, told me it has been years since a man has been down there. Apologized for being fat as she squeezed her stomach and flopped it up and down, I did not care at all, she sucked my cock and I was about to lick pussy for the first time so I was having fun. I tried my best to lick her clit a lot, had read about what a woman likes but never did it, not sure she had an orgasm but she told me the alcohol and other stuff were probably why, when I asked what other stuff she just smiled and then laughed saying she was not sure but really felt fucked up right now.
    I attacked her clit sucking and licking on it hard and fast and she finally had one, peed a little bit on my face and sheets but once again I did not care. She was still laughing and then asked if I was sure this was okay or was she fucking me up in the head doing this, I told her no and I was having fun, she started trying to rollover and asked me to fuck her, got herself up on her knees with her ass high and wiggled back and forth saying please fuck me.
    I never even gave a thought to her getting pregnant, she just kept saying yes and yes, more and more, keep going and I felt my balls getting tight again and just came inside her pussy. I stopped and pulled out as she fell over laughing still and looked at my cock dangling there and asked me to bring it to her mouth to suck me again. I think she did not realize I had just done that in her, she saw cum on my cock and asked if I already came, told her yes but she licked it off anyways, ran her fingers into her pussy and licked those also asking me why I wasted it, she loves cum. I had no idea what to do next, she seemed so with it but at the same time was this totally different person to me. So sexual and wanting more and more.
    She came in dancing and left dancing, went to her room naked and I wondered what tomorrow would bring for me, i got my answer around ten am when she walked out having showered and was dressed.
    She started going on about last night, holy smokes was the party just crazy, she put her hand over her mouth and was wide eyed and said she took things that she should not have and it really fucked her up, I told her I know, she came into my room when she got home and was dancing then stripped off her clothes. She looked at me laughing and said I did that!! I was totally honest with her and asked if she remembered having sex with me, she smacked me on the arm and said NO! I would have remembered that!! was staring at me then just said WHAT, we did it? I told her about the big dark spot on one of her breasts and she gasped out asking me what all happened then she apologized again saying I must be just freaked out right now. I told her no and actually I would love another blow job from her, told her she said last night she loves giving them and tasting a mans cum. Oh my God she replied, I do love doing that and can believe I said it. She was even better sober, deep throated me and it felt amazing.

    Leaving My Wife For My Son

    He moved in with his girlfriend at 19. After two good years, he caught the bitch cheating on him in the worst way. He spied his best friend fucking his fiancée in the bed they shared. So, my son returned home to live with us at age 21.

    As for me, I'd been married for 23 years. That's how it was in my day. You married young, got her pregnant, and gave your parents grandchildren...or...you got her pregnant young, you got married, and you gave your parents grandchildren whom they ended up loving after they'd lectured you for being irresponsible and giving in to pre-marital sex.

    Obviously after 23 years and a few months together, my wife and I weren't having much sex anymore. In fact we hadn't done it in three years. I has assumed, falsely, that we'd be on each other at all times of day, once our son was out of the house. No, my wife and I had a talk soon after my son had moved out with his girlfriend. Menopause meant she no longer had interest in sex.

    After he moved back in with us, my son spied me masturbating one time. He noticed that some of the porn I was watching was bisexual. He confronted me and asked whether I loved his mom.

    I told him that watching porn and masturbating is not cheating. He said that after the trauma he'd experienced at the hands of his slutty fiancée, he had no choice but to tell his mom what I was up to.

    I pleaded with him not to destroy our marriage and our family, least of all over porn clips on my computer. Unlike his fiancée, I had never had sex outside my relationship.

    I asked him whether he ever masturbated. He thought for a moment, and said yes.

    Did he watch porn? Yes.

    I thought for a moment. Since we're both not getting sex right now, maybe we can help each other out.

    He was hesitant but he laid down next to me on the bed. I put the laptop and the porn away.

    My wife was at her knitting club meeting so I knew we wouldn't be disturbed for a few hours.

    I slid my hand into his shorts, pulled the fabric to the side, and fished my son's cock out through the leg opening. I was proud of my son. He had a big dick, just like his dad.

    I'm not sure about this, dad.

    I told him to close his eyes and think of the hottest girl from back in high school or middle school, while I jerked his cock.

    He started moaning, and thrusting his hips. In two minutes, he said, I'm getting close, dad.

    I quickly put my mouth on my son's cock. There wasn't a second to spare. I felt the first blast of warm semen hit the back of my throat just as my lips closed on his thick shaft.

    He grabbed the back of my head and fucked his load down my throat.

    We kind of avoided each other for the next few days, but our horniness caught up with us.

    For our second dad-son encounter, he gave me a hand-job.

    It went on like that for a few weeks. I could tell that he was hurting from his fiancée's betrayal, though. He could tell I was lonely from his mom's menopause-induced frigidity. We had a frank talk. We hugged. I kissed my son like a lover for the first time, him 21 and me 43. He kissed me back.

    After that the floodgates opened. Whenever his mom was out, we explored each other's bodies. We connected sexually in every way that two men could connect. Organically, we settled into roles, with him being the bottom boy and me, the top dad. (We flipped occasionally. It's not that taking dick is too feminine for me or that the younger man has to be the bottom.)

    Predictably, my wife caught us. Lots of anger but there was nothing she could do. Our state forbids marriage between a parent and an adult child, but not sex.

    She also realized they antagonizing us and shaming us in publicly would backfire on her (what kind of wife is so non-sexual that her husband has to fuck his own son?). In the end, she quietly took the generous divorce settlement my lawyer offered.

    My son and I have moved to a new town for a fresh start. Even our gay friends make jokes about our daddy-son relationship (little do they know!) and even our straight friends admit how devoted we are.

    I love you, son. Thank you for rescuing me from a dead marriage. I hope I rescued you from the aftermath of a dead engagement. Everything I have is yours, including my body and my heart.

    What's Going On With My Family

    I am a normal healthy 21 Yr old Male good job, nice girlfriend living at home for the moment.
    In my job you are taught not to believe in coincidences!

    I was at home the other day and was aware that sister was home as her car was there. I had a few community tasks to complete then I was free to relax.
    I was busy posting a couple of notes as I wasn't on duty again for about 5 days and all of a sudden there's a noise from one of the Bluetooth speakers in our house and its a soft sexy voice and basically its a teenage girl seducing her father. I could hear it plain as day , the girl on the speaker was telling her dad how she can suck cock better than mummy.
    Sorry I wasn't expecting this but it was hot and I was hard. " oh fuck me daddy, make me your own, own me daddy , give me your cum" I couldn't take anymore and pulled my cock out and started to wank, unfortunately the speaker made a noise and it was gone. There's movement upstairs but I have got to cum now and oddly im think of my sister who is 19 by the way.
    I had chance to clean myself up, open the blinds and when Jenna walked in I made out I was having a nap. Jenna looks not unlike my girlfriend but I have never thought of her sexually before.
    Well that was that, but today Saturday morning Dad's playing golf, Jenna working just me and mum home. Mum seemed to be taking ages in the shower, eventually she finished. I am in need of the loo and in I go, sat my self down about to let go and what do my keen coppers eye spot? A suction cup dildo stuck on the bathroom tiled wall.

    What the hell is going on in this house. I stopped and slowly went down stairs to the toilet there. I didn't say a word but for the second time in a couple of days I had a wank over a family member.

    When I came I said sorry mum I have a bit of a bad stomach and didn't want to stink the house out.
    Anyway I had breakfast chatted and when I went to the family bathroom the dildo was gone .
    Ok so it was mum's not Jennas but why do I want to sniff it and put it in my mouth.
    I can't explain.

  • My Son

    My son, 15, is a femboy, faggot, c*ck sucking c*m drinker that uses his hands to pump the loads out he so desperately needs and I find it sexy knowing that he is swallowing all his friends cream, probably his dad's too.