Who doesn't have an Uncle Bubba, with the beer belly and obnoxious belching, or the Aunt Petunia with the bright red lipstick and too-tight pants? We all have at least one person in the family tree we'd all wish would be plucked. If your relatives would make a good comedy routine, then we want to hear about them. This category is for all those stories about loud aunts, drunk brothers, flatulent uncles, and slutty sisters.

Face It, Adult Family Fun Is On The Increasrlee

My great nan told me during one of her dementia episodes how her family all slept with their daddy. She said they all shared a house different sisters and husbands and when her mum died they looked after daddy. She grabbed by cock and called me daddy, at this time but the nurse was on parade. I remembered that and went home and wanked.

Which brings me to my point. I can't afford to move out so I am still living with my parents, my dad's a slob who isn't considerate to my mum so I have been buttering her up, walking around with my hard cock out, and she loves it. Says put it away you will have someone's eye out.
One day dad was at the pub said a girl on line wanted to know how big I was and could she help me measure it with her dressmakers tape.
She was amazed I had to go on line.
I said im not attractive or confident and wouldn't know what to do. I pulled my joggers down and im 185mm because im smooth , I said can you help she lowered her head and said I'll measure you the old fashioned way and swallowed my cock whole, the dirty slut played with my balls and fingered my hole and i came in her mouth. That was at the end of Covid me and mum have sex nearly every day now. Very occasionally I have the old man's cum to deal with.

  • Diabetic Dad Doesn't Do It

    I am sorry, I am sure many readers on here are going to dislike this post. I never went to Uni I went straight to a junior job in a large car dealership in the UK. I am 22 have a top of the range German car and can pull a girl when I want one. I often dont have Sundays off because I am greedy and like closing sales and the weekends are the most lucrative.
    I was off about a month ago in bed looking at some milf porn on my phone when I heard my folks having sex, it started ok and I was having a tug listening to it, all of a sudden, I hear my dad say sorry this isn't working, my mum tries to encourage him and next thing he's out the door with the dog walking off his frustration.
    I hear then as the door closes my mums bedside drawer open and the power of her vibration toy thing actually makes my phone crackle.
    I then have a glorious wank thinking of my sweet mum, who's someone most guys any age would love to fuck but not a Milf.

    Then it happened again a week ago in the middle of the night, this time dad left mum high and dry while he took a shower, the same toy of hers upset my phone but gave me a hard on.l thinking about my mum playing with her pussy.
    Mum is 53 size 12 lovely tit's and a big enough ass, she dresses very conservatively, but her underwear and toys reveal a different side to my parents, poor mum.
    Well I am a salesman first and foremost and taught to recognise signs and now days learn an awful lot of psychology.
    So ever since dad couldn't get it up for mum last month, I have been flirting with her and she has loved it and flirted back, I have commented on her dresses and said how summery she looked and reminds me of Doris Day, one day when dad was bowling we had a water fight in the garden, her dress didn't reveal anything but her ripples grew on her 36c breasts.
    Anyway yesterday morning after being out Friday night dad got brave and tried to bang my mum, sadly for dad the prescription isn't working. He got frustrated and Ruby our labrador had a early walk again.
    As soon as the dog and dad were in the car, I didn't give mum a chance to fuck her self with her wand.
    I moved in I am slim 6ft much taller than my dad, I work out and my cock is an average 6 but its stiff like iron . I going parents room mun quickly put her phone under the covers and I know that my mum can't but help see my hard cock tenting through my light shorts!
    Mum im so sorry , you need to get him some help, and then she burst into tears. I then pounce I jump on the bed holding telling not to worry things will be OK, all the time I am smoothing her back and her tit's are pointing then I see she has no panties on answer has a landing strip glistening with her juices.
    Fuck it it has Sale written all over it I kiss her cheeks gently then her neck then I lower my mouth to her nipple. Good old mum she's definitely interested she wants to buy and grabs my cock.
    Shes keen that's obvious I take my shorts off and stand on the mattress towering over and she kneels up on the bed and sucks my cock.
    There is no doubts, time to cool off , I have timed it just right. I push her away and signal for her to lay on the bed and we are soon in the 69 position and within no time at all my mum is pissing juices into my mouth . I am about to cum but I want it right in the hole I came out of 22 years ago and so does she, she is fucking hot and horny, so energetic the beds creaking and she's as noisy as hell and we both cum.

    We are silent holding each other panting and she says thank you baby.
    I've been reading about diabetes and I say mum why dont you wank dad off or let him wank off. Hes concentrating to much on pleasing you, just get him to accept he probably can't fuck you any more. You can use your toys and I'll give you the best sex I can whenever dad's not around.
    Amazingly she's agreed to the deal.

    My Sister Saw Me Naked

    My sister saw me naked when i was changing, my dick was soft and now she laugh at me because she thinks it is small, i told her that when it gets hard it is above average, but she doesnt believe that

  • New Family

    My wife and I have been trying to have a baby for almost a year now. After lots of test, it’s come back that I have a low sperm count. Though not impossible it is gonna take some work, Or so we were told.

    Well, she’s missed her cycle the last two months , took a home pregnancy test, and it came back positive. I can’t explain how excited I am right now.

    Her first appointment was yesterday to get confirmed, and she told me that I did not need to go. It was all routine and nothing was gonna be done out of the ordinary. Although I was a little bummed out, I understood that I should probably save my time for when I really need it.

    Now I find out her father went with her, which I think is a little odd. She also said her father wants to know the sex of the baby so he could redo a room and turn it into a nursery at our house. I told her that I kind of thought that was between us, and she said you know how bossy daddy can be.

    I don’t like the fact that he’s taking this upon himself to do all this, and robbed me of all my thunder. I just don’t understand why he’s doing this. It’s not his responsibility. It’s mine.

    I Am Going To Miss My Sister

    I leave for college in 2 days. My sister and I have been having an affair for over 3 years. I love her so much and I know everything is probably going to end soon once I leave as this obviously can’t really continue. She is about 3 years younger than me but our relationship has always been really strong. I am feeling so many emotions because I don’t want us to end and neither does she. We can’t get enough of each other lately as we know it’ll end soon. The sex has always been phenomenal. I don’t know if I’ll ever find someone I feel so strongly about as I do her. I’ll always love her and I always will look back on things fondly. Sucks because I think we both knew it could never last. Not really looking for advice or anything, just sad and wanted to pour my heart out somewhere.

  • My Older Brother

    I want to confess I masturbate thinking of sucking my older brothers cock. He lives alone. Fantasy scenario. I go over to his house for the weekend and we’re hanging out and he asks were you serious about what you said looking for a blow buddy? I said only if you are? All you have to do is pull out your cock and I’ll suck it right there. It can be a good weekend of me sucking your cock whenever you want or we can just hang out.

    He just stares at me and says I’ll think about it. A few hours later he comes in from the kitchen with his cock out and sits next to me and I look over and see him with his cock out and he says, well? I immediately go over and put his cock in my mouth so he doesn’t have a second thought about it. I blow him all weekend long until I go back home.

    We never talk about it again but he knows anytime I visit and he pulls out his cock, I’ll suck it! That’s my fantasy

    My Brothers Dick

    He is my brother from uncle, a we had normal familiar relationship until one day
    He was in my room and i needed to go out, by walking by him i touched his legs with my butt, at first i didnt realised but i thought he had something in his pocket and walked away.
    When i came back to room, he was there sitting on his phone, i sat next to him and put my legs on his legs. I think one minute was to much, something started to touch my feets, i moved my legs a little bit to put that thing away, i zhought it was his wallet or something, and i realised it was his dick. From my legs movement it gets hard, and what i felt on my legs it was heavy.
    He did not reacted, and i puted my legs away after few minutes.
    My boyfriend is about 13cm long, and i think from what i saw on my brothers shorts that he is above average, minimum 20 cm, i never saw dick that big.
    From that day, i think about that shape on his shorts, it was so hard, i thought it would jump from his shorts.
    I love my boyfriend and we have good sex, but i would like to just see what my brothers big dick looks like, i am so shy to ask him

    The Morning I Licked One Of My Moms Nipples

    She was not feeling very good when we were going to bed, had taken an over amount of night time cough and cold syrup along with a host of other things for it. She looked at me and said if she not up by 6:30 for work go in and wake her up.
    We went to bed and the next morning around that time she had not come out of her room and I did not hear her shower going, I felt strange sticking my head into the open door to see if she was awake and just as I was about to say Hey Mom! are you awake I noticed something very white with a reddish circular, OH my God, one of her boobs was sticking out of the twisted pajama top she was wearing.
    I slowly walked up to the side of the bed just staring at it, white skin rarely seeing the sun if ever and her areola surrounding an erect nipple. I only had a few minutes to take all this in so I knelt down and was staring at all of it exposed to me then my perverted mind took over. I got my mouth up close to it and began running the tip of my tongue all around her nipple then over it, she stirred some but barely moved at all and I kept it up until suddenly she woke up yelling my name at the top of her lungs and asking me what in Gods name I thought I was doing. Oh my God, get out of here now!! she shouted at me as I laughed all the way out her door to the kitchen.
    She came out about half an hour later, smacked me across my arm and asked me again why I thought that was a good idea, I told her Hey, you did not really say how you wanted to be woken up and I laughed again, more smacking and she told me NOT LIKE THAT FOR SURE!! She made herself a coffee to go, took some more medicine and went to work.

    Never Thought This Would Happen Again.

    My sister is two years older than I am and when I was about twelve she got very curious about boys and wanted to explore me, I was also allowed to do the same with her and we had like five years of fun off and on. The summers were usually when we did the most because we had the house to ourselves every day so crazy things would happen, she was very into role play and enjoyed being tied up and sexually played around with telling me what she wanted done and also letting me come up with things. When she started college we never really picked up playing around again, she had a boyfriend then got married, I started working and joined the military retiring from it as soon as I could then started working for the post office back here locally.
    She ended up divorced about three years ago, I helped her out getting things fixed around her house and what not, moral support and she is pretty tough anyways so seemed to handle it okay. We talk on the phone and text often so like a year ago I am sitting around on a weekend evening, not much going on just relaxing and I get this text from her that reads If I came over would you want to tie me up and do things again? I sat there reading it a few times going Really? Is she just messing around with me or something?
    We are certainly not young and fit anymore, she is in better shape than I am and has really large breasts, always wondered what they would be like now because they seemed pretty firm really. So I reply back telling her I have some rope if she is game and wonder where this going to end up, she replies pretty much right back saying she is on her way over. I am reading her reply and thinking, OH! Crap, do I have rope? Luckily I find some minutes before she pulls up, along with some twine that I am thinking will work nicely winding around those big boobs and maybe make them really stand up. I am still just amazed at how this all was going that evening, she shows up and is excited about it, basically says Hi and wants to know where I want her and is holding this shoulder bag with sex toys in it for me to use on her.
    Not to bore you with tie up details but I ended up putting her into a legs bent and spread out, arms stretched out above her for plenty of boob access, twine worked pretty well making them stand up nicely when tied together after wrapping them pretty good. I see these clamps in the bag and ask her what she uses these for and she said they go on her nipples or pussy lips if I want to, nipples it is I thought and learned how the work really enjoying the results.
    I started out licking her pussy mainly because it had been a while for me, plenty of extra play with my fingers both tickling and fucking her with them also, she had a great orgasm according to her then she said something that really had me going. She said she loved what I did with her boobs and I should titty fuck her and she will suck me also. So a few minutes later I am pushing my cock thru them and she is licking the head of it until I started getting nice and hard, always the idea person she says between licks I should play with her nipples also, pulling and pinching them some and in my mind I am thinking How does she not have a boyfriend to do this with, men would be lining up for this. I ask her if she wants to swallow, she says my choice whatever I want to do so just kept up the motion and came in her mouth.
    I get back off of her and start undoing her, she says What? you are done already? Give me another orgasm with some of the toys, keep playing around with me please it has been a while. So as I am turning on a vibrator and staring at this huge dildo also I asked her saying surely there were other men she could be doing this with so why me again. She replied right back saying she trusted me and most guys these days are fucking assholes. She goes on telling me she had her ex tie her up a few times then he screwed it up by doing things to her that she did not want done like anal and gagging her with deep throating, he actually bought a mouth ring gag and forced his cock right down there making her gag and puke. She thought she was going to choke on her own vomit one time, could not even trust her own husband not to go too far with things.
    So I just enjoy playing around with her again, things are still really good between us and she is a lot of fun sexually even though we are both older now.

  • Lesbian Affair With My Stepmother

    As an avid reader of the posts here, I decided to post my own confession. My mother left my father and me with him when I was around 8. A coup!e of years later, my father meets another incredible lady and they get married. I was so happy they found each other. My dad was happy again and my life once again seemed normal. Immediately I took to my stepmother, especially since my birth mother never ever contacted me again. My new mother was incredible, and was very affectionate to me. She took me places, played games with me, and very soon filled every role to me that a mother would.
    I can remember hearing her and dad making love and their moans. Little did I know at that time, that she was bisexual. Within a few months, she and I became very close, and whenever my dad was not at home, which was often as he traveled for work, I would sleep in their bed with her. Whenever we slept together in the same bed, she would cuddle me closely, touching me, all over kissing on me, telling me how much she loved me. However, she never crossed the line at that point.
    By the time I was 12, I had developed a special closeness with girls, and to be more definate, I was more attracted to girls than boys. This bothered me, but I felt a closeness with my stepmother that I felt I could confide in her my issue. So, one night as we lay in bed, I told her of my issue. Immediately she told me that she understood and then went on to tell me in confidence, that she was bisexual, and enjoyed both men and women, and had her entire life. That night was the first night of my escalator with my stepmother. She held me, touched me intimately over my body, kissed me, not as a parent, but as a lover, passionately, and we had sex together. She of course told me, that this would have to be our secret between her and I, and that my dad could never know. I had no problem with that at all.
    And so, from that night on, my stepmother and I have been lesbian lovers. I am 18 now, and my father has no idea. I love her, and honestly never plan on leaving home. Whenever my dad is home, I know that she and I have to be very careful getting together. Whenever he is home, and I hear them having sex, I masturbate listening to her moans, wishing it was me giving her that pleasure. I love kissing with her, and love when we lick and suck each other nipples. She eats my puss y so incredibly well giving me multiple orgasms. I love tasting her pussy and licking up her sweet juices. And my favorite, is when we scissor each other feeling our clits rubbing on each others and our pussy juices mixing together when we cum. I love her, and I know she loves me.
    Well, that is my confession.