Who doesn't have an Uncle Bubba, with the beer belly and obnoxious belching, or the Aunt Petunia with the bright red lipstick and too-tight pants? We all have at least one person in the family tree we'd all wish would be plucked. If your relatives would make a good comedy routine, then we want to hear about them. This category is for all those stories about loud aunts, drunk brothers, flatulent uncles, and slutty sisters.

I Had To

My nephew exposed his substantial penis my way back at 15 years of age. His member has been a running joke in our family since he hit puberty. Even as a baby when my sister changed his diapers we would laugh about the lady killer he would become possessing such a magnificent appendage. Puberty did not disappoint. He became famous in his locker rooms for his mass and the girls would date him just to see it and brag about using it. Many times he would expose himself to me and family using any excuse or opportunity to drop a towel doing his oops, how did that happen. He was very proud to say the least. Well on one occasion he simply walked into the kitchen in his boxer shorts with his meat swinging thru the material when his mother and I were having a coffee. I asked as to how big it was and his mother got out a shoe lace and a ruler. He gladly took off his shorts and let us measure. The kid was a flaccid 7.3” long by 6.9” in circumference. His cock was the biggest I had ever seen and he wasn’t even erect. Of course I asked that he get it erect with his answer being, “you get it erect.” We laughed, smart kid, but what the Hell, so I wrapped my hand around it and got him hard. His member grew to 9.7” long and 7.7” in circumference. I made a joke how no woman could wrap her mouth around that and many would not be able to sit on it. Fast forward three years or so he 19 and were sharing my truck to travel to a big family affair. We spoke of his cock and that day in the kitchen. I asked if it had gotten larger since that day with him saying it had but not much bigger. He then pulled it out and asked that I jack him off while I drove. And I did. He had his head back enjoying my hand. My pussy became very wet and I pulled the truck onto a farmer’s road and we got out into a hay field. My God there I was slowly sliding his cock into me as he laid on his back. Both of us nude in the privacy of the grain that blocked us from sight. It wasn’t easy, let me tell you. And I am a very wet pussy woman. With much work and taking our time he was fully in me. I’m 5’10 and even at my size, he had me stretched to my limits. I would say the first 9 inches reached my limit but he now had to be 10” inches and I had to be careful. The friction of his girth pulling my clit into my opening like a black hole sucking in planets, brought me to an earth moving orgasm. I had not even noticed that he too came as well I was so enveloped in my own climax. He then asked me to sit on his face. I said your cum is flowing out of me and he insisted I do. He ate me for awhile but frankly my clit was too sensitive. He rolled me over onto my back and with my help we guided his wand into my hole. Thank God his sperm acted as an additional lube as he jackhammered my c**t into oblivion. It was a pain pleasure experience. We got up dressed and proceeded to the family function no one the wiser. I walked funny for a few days and we have fucked a dozen or so times but realistically to take that size of cock on a regular basis, is a scary thought. I’ve noticed he has trouble keeping a girl and admitted they all avoid sex rather than want it. Sad really. Ladies, be careful what you ask for. And men? Less is really more.

  • She Was My Stepdaughter When We Met. Five Years Later She Is My Wife.

    I guess there was an instant attraction when I met and married her mom. Pretty soon my new stepdaughter and I were flirting playfully. We never expected it to turn into something. It was a pleasant distraction. When we kissed the first time, we both knew it was serious.

    We had to keep our budding relationship a secret...all the more when I learned that my new wife had a terminal illness and would be gone within months.

    My stepdaughter helped me so much with the home health care and all the preparations, emotional and physical.

    It was week from the end, when my wife's health took a turn for the worse, that my daughter and I could resist no longer. We made love the first time after coming home from an exhausting day at the hospital.

    We were both so tired that we fell asleep right after, without discussing the elephant in the room, the line we had crossed.

    Fortunately we did not have to lie to my new wife, her mother, for long. within 3 days she slipped out of consciousness, and a few days after that, she was gone.

    I was in so much despair and distress that making love to my stepdaughter was the only thing that could take my mind off the loss.

    So make love we did, a lot. She told
    me as I was cumming in her for the third time one day: "Marry me, Dad!"

    That must have been the time that got her pregnant. But I would have married her either way.

    It's been five years and those painful memories have faded. My loving, loyal stepdaughter has been at my side. We had our 5th wedding anniversary last week!

    My Son Masturbates Thinking Of Me

    My son was a bit preoccupied as we sat at the table for dinner,
    Im 40 my son is 18 and its just us two.
    I put my knife and fork down and asked him what he had on his mind .
    He told me how he masturbates several tines a day ,i told him that it was normal to masturbate we all do it even me i told him.
    He went on to tell me whan he masturbates he thinks of me i know its wrong he said.
    I took his hand and put it on my left breast and let him fondle me then i said we couldn't have sex but im willing to strip naked infront of him and let him masturbate while looking at me.
    We both got jaked his cock was pointing straight up then he started wanking his cock it wasn't long before he shot a load over my thighs.

  • What Did I Start?

    I am a single mom, one son 18 years old. He’s only had one girlfriend and is pretty shy. Last week she left him for another guy. Long story short last Saturday night I was consoling him at home. Made him dinner and tried to cheer him up. I probably had too much wine. I gave him a kiss to help lift him up, but things got overheated. I know this is terrible but I started kissing his neck, then lower to his chest, down to his abdomen (flat and muscular) and he pulled out his penis. I hadn’t seen it in several years, but it is identical to his late fathers. I told him that. He slowly pushed my head down and gave his penis a light kiss. Then a bigger kiss. I started getting horny and gave him a blow job and swallowed every drop. We slept together that night and had mind blowing sex. That continued all weekend and into this week. I’m not sure how to put brakes on this, and I am feeling guilty.

    A Most Unconventional Family

    I was 27, she was 23. We met at work, and shared many similar feelings. Over a period of a year we decided to move in together. There appeared on the scene an older 'wise' man. At 32 I submitted to his desire and became pregnant. A year later while my girlfriend and partner was playing with our baby, I told her she should consider getting pregnant.

    Five years later, much older and wiser we had four children between us. Being the younger partner, and lower earner she opted to stay home to save on child care. All along the wise man showered us with emotional, and financial support, allowing us to live a comfortable upper middle class lifestyle.

    Ten years had passed since we met him, several girlfriends had come and gone. We decided to adopt him. Making him the man of the hour. He accepted, we told him no more girlfriends, we were there if he wanted us.

    From days when being gay raised eyebrows, to days when getting pregnant on purpose with a donor, to now living in a household of a man and two women, we can't ask for more. Really. Let the neighbors' imagination go wild, it's the question on their lips but never spoken. While we cuddle at night beside him. He's ours and our children's' father figure. Peace on Earth, Peace in our Home, what more can we ask for.

  • Nephew

    My nephew was wanting my puss cause he asked about my tits and was watching me pee we was drinking together I was drunk almost and then we were going at it and we couldn’t stop he was maybe 6 inches but it felt great but he wants it again and I was like no we can’t do it again now he cums on all my stuff and I don’t care about it but I’m going to have to love him again and he said I’m the best he’s ever had I love him but I want my butthole licked and I’m going to get him to do that in

    Cousin

    When i was 15 my older cousin who’s a girl, invited me to do homework. but we were laying down on the floor doing homework. time goes by and i remember her turn and say she’s tired and i gave her a kick and said wake up. then she kicked me back and i started to turned , when i was turning she kicked me in my crotch. it hurt so i grabbed it and kinda grunted. she said she was sorry and started grabbing it and she was sorry. and squeezed it a little bit then gave it a kiss, then she went back to doing homework. i was really horny after. about 5 minutes later she said she was done grabbed her things and went to her room. we haven’t talked about it since or ever mentioned it. but it was a weird experience

    Loving Cousins - Part 1

    I have 3 girl cousins that are more like sisters to me, especially the middle one. She's 2 years older than me. We hung out each summer either in Southern California (their place) or in Western Canada (our place)
    As is often the case, we always wanted to sleep together as kids. The summer I turned 12 she was 14 and it was one of the last summers we shared beds. The second night as we tucked into bed we hugged, then started to grope. I was behind her with my arm over her and my hands were under her flimsy nightie top. She had grown her boobs since last summer and I began to play with them, which she enjoyed. I also enjoy this as my growing erection revealed. It was poking into her ass and she reached behind me to do her own groping and I was really enjoying the attention I was getting. She lifted up to allow my bottom arm access, then moved my top hand down into her thin shorts to her down covered pussy.
    This was a new experience for me and it was wet, warm and fascinating. I didn't exactly know what I was doing but she moved my hand the way she wanted and I was a fast learner. She allowed this fun to go on for about 10 minutes before she shuddered and bucked. I never got off myself, but each night we quietly performed the same ritual. She loved it and I also thought it was fun.
    After that 10 days they went home and when we got together the following year, we had different sleeping accommodations that kept us apart.
    When she turned 16, she met the fellow that would become her husband, so her attention was solely on him. I'm 99% sure that she's only touched 2 cocks in her life; mine and her husband. Things came full circle a few months ago...........

    My Dear Cousin Who Learned From Me And Taught Me Everything

    During my teens we had a girl cousin come stay with us while her parents took a trip to Europe. In order to accommodate her, my brother and I had to move in with my two older brothers, our bunk beds moved with us. She had a single bed borrowed from a neighbor. Overnight we had a girl in the house.

    She used my parents bathroom, and I crawled onto a a fence and looked in on her in the shower. I learned that from the boy next door who watched my mother shower. We watched my cousin.

    I was on the floor reading a book when she stood over me, one foot on either side of my head. I turned over and looked up her skirt to her bare crotch. She pulled her dress up to her waist. "Have you seen enough?" before lowering herself in a crouch over my face. "Now?"

    Over the next days she invited me into her room where she stood naked. She wore a blouse without a bra. She walked around with only her pajama top on, her nipples visible under her top. As the week came to an end I was looking at her baked on her bed, her legs open. "Make me feel you".

    We had sex that afternoon, before my parents came home. My condition was to keep my brothers informed.

    The day she left she gave me a blowjob before laying back for one more time before her parents showed up. She was over affectionate and said she didn't want to be alone without me. I told her I thought I was in love with her. She said 'me to'.

    It was another three years before we saw each other again. She swore to me that she had saved herself for me, and rolled her eyes when I told her I had saved myself for her too. We ran away four years later after we both had finished college.

  • Dreams Of Mom

    I'm 20f and been having thoughts of my mom. I've never been interested in women before, but I can't stop thinking about her. I've seen her getting out of the shower and she's gorgeous in a mature woman way. She has large DD cup breasts that sag and thick nipples. She's a curvy woman with thick hips and some extra pounds on her, but that just makes her look like a woman, and she has a trimmed pussy. She's gorgeous. When I masturbate, I can't help thinking about making out with her, sucking those pink nipples, worshipping her pussy with my tongue. Sometimes I dream of letting her catch me fucking myself with my dildo and moaning her name.

    It's not just sexual though. I dream of sharing a life with her. Going on dates, getting married, getting pregnant and having children with her. I want to be her partner in life, not just a fuckbuddy.