Who doesn't have an Uncle Bubba, with the beer belly and obnoxious belching, or the Aunt Petunia with the bright red lipstick and too-tight pants? We all have at least one person in the family tree we'd all wish would be plucked. If your relatives would make a good comedy routine, then we want to hear about them. This category is for all those stories about loud aunts, drunk brothers, flatulent uncles, and slutty sisters.

I Set Her Up On Purpose

I had these shorts that were very loose on me, the head of my cock would show slightly out of the leg hole or just be visible with the large leg opening. I knew sooner or later she would come to my room asking about this or that and I was ready for her, I would turn my chair around and ask her what is up as I kept my legs open giving her a view. Her eyes went down a few words into her question, she stumbled and looked up at me then back down again. She stopped then turned around and left my room so I went back to my gaming and let it ride. Few minutes later she came back again, did the same thing and this time I was a little more excited, I could feel the chair cushion on the bottom of my cock head, knew she could easily see it peeking out. She was smiling and not able to talk, she pointed down at it then looked at me so I looked down at it and asked if she wanted to see more of it or maybe touch it. She stared for a few seconds then asked if she could touch it, the first touch of her fingers made me contract and my cock head jumped upwards and it started getting an erection pushing further out of the leg hole. She sat down right in front of the chair and had both hands up running her fingers over the head and shaft, I slid myself to the edge of the seat putting my cock within a foot of her face, pulled my short up some exposing more of me for her fingers to explore. She began caressing my balls and was just staring it everything with this little smile of wonder. The next question she asked was how much bigger does it get? and she giggled some, told her not much more, just about fully hard. Few minutes later and a few more questions, I told her she could see me cum if she wanted to but she would have to either stroke me harder or suck on it. She looked up at me wide eyed, suck on it?!?! like with my mouth? I told her yeah, she did not have to put all of it in her mouth just like this part and maybe down to here as I ran my finger over the cock head and about an inch down on my shaft. She was thinking about it and still running her fingers over it then she just leaned forward and started doing it, her lips felt amazing wrapped around the head and sucking. She was sitting with her legs crossed and just rocking forward and back sucking on me like she had done this before which just amazed me. I asked her if she wanted to swallow the cum or maybe stroke me onto her chest, suggested she take off her t-shirt for it mostly because I wanted to see her tits. I helped her get the shirt off then she went back to sucking with me promising to let her know when to stop and stroke me off. The sight of her nipples nicely erect and bouncing some as she moved around was a huge turn on for me, ejaculation was coming on so I said Okay, go ahead and stop sucking and start stroking now. Seconds later the first shot of it hit her neck and between her tits, few more followed as she let out a giggle and then leaned back in and started sucking again getting a taste of it and liking it. When she stopped she looked down at herself and laughed saying she was a little messy and was going to go shower off. She told me it was a lot of fun and wanted to do it again tomorrow, I watched her walk off out of my room and thought this is going to be a great summer break for sure.

  • All In The Family

    My mother met my father in college and she got pregnant. She thought about it but decided not to go through with an abortion. She begged him to marry her and he did (because he was drunk) when she was seven months pregnant. That's the story she tells, and who are we to say it's not true. I was there, but still inside, so I can't be a witness. What my mother did not know at the time is that my father had a wife in his home town, from when he was a teenager and a girl got pregnant there. That marriage was still live and although he was away for college, she was home with the kids.

    When my mother found out my father had a wife at home, with two kids, she was already pregnant with my sister inside. It was a shock, but he had cheated on his wife with my mother, not the other way around. To make it short, my mother kept on having kids with my father and his wife kept on having kids with my father. An arms race. Neither one would back down.

    My mother lived as his wife, although technically her marriage was not recognized, because he was already married. But that didn't matter, she was his wife and he lived with her most of the time, but went home to check on his wife and came back once she got pregnant again. By the time I was ten I knew the whole story. It's not like it was a secret. My mother said that she was the city wife, and that other wife, was the country wife. The other wife said that she was the 'real' wife, and my mother was the 'concubine' wife. She used the word concubine to describe my mother. Although they didn't socialize together they did meet each other and spent the time complimenting each other as to how pretty or nice or handsome the other wife's kids were. And look, they have green eyes. My paternal grandmother has green eyes, so that's proof.

    It was for a Thanksgiving that I got pregnant with my half brother Tom. It wasn't some kind of acting out, or anything like that. My brother Tom, who is older, always chased me around, and I mean he chased me around as kids, he caught me and held me down. In those days he was practicing how to get on a girl, me. I got pregnant because he did what he practiced, but without my pants on. Why my pants weren't on? Well that's another question that doesn't have an answer.

    We couldn't get married, not legally or officially. So we have to live outside of the sanctity of marriage. But like my mother and my father, my mother is 'his' wife, I'm Tom's wife. I bake the babies and he keeps his finger in the mix. We left for college all pregnant and baked three babies and he got his degree in Aeronautical Engineering and I got my degree in home cooking, baking babies, and keeping him happy. I'm working on a 'real' degree.

    One thing you cannot deny, all 'us' girls know how to be wives.

    Happy Slut To My Cousin

    I lost my virginity at 15 to an older cousin (don't ask about the age gap) and have never looked back on other lovers. Maybe it's the "forbidden" factor that makes it so fucking hot, but no other lover comes close to how he makes me feel (and yes, both of us do have other lovers for the sake of appearances, even though it's kind of a "known secret" that we're a couple, even among family).
    After the first time, we couldn't stop. I did everything I could to sneak out of school or out of my mom's house to be with him and spend the day fucking. From him I learned every way to make a man mad with pleasure during sex and get to know my body, discover what makes me mad with pleasure.
    Today, we're basically what we call "tacitly married": I have my place and he has his, but most of the time I stay with him, except when we're having family over or going to a family event. Our friends accept us, mostly, and we openly date and go to swinger clubs together. We like to have out fun with other people but, for all effects and purposes, he is my man. we're perfect together. I'm happy to be his slut, as we like to say in private. He worships my body but I like how he also "r*pes" me. (He doesn't actually do that, it's what we like to say for him to subdue me and basically have his way with me like a whore). He's so manly, tall, muscular, dominating, big cock but not too big, totally perverted and addicted to moaning in my ear as he cums inside me, a feeling we're both addicted to. I like to ask him to breed me, that usually makes him explode. We're obviously not going to do that for real, but the kin itself really gets us going.

  • I Set My Cousin Up So She Would Be Able To See It

    My cousin called me one day during the summer, she was bored and wanted to come over to my house so she could swim in the lake, told her come on over and we can swim all day. I pretended that I did not have actual an actual swimsuit and wore gym shorts, they were dark colored but had no liner in them so between the leg holes being big and the wet material clinging to my cock she was getting an eye full. It worked perfectly, like an hour into hanging out she asked if I wanted to see her breasts and could she see my cock, we played around for like two hours just touching each other and exploring both down at the lake then back up at the house in my room. Her parents never let her wear anything revealing, her swimsuit was this one piece that even had a skirt sewn on it covering her front and rear. The top part had a essentially a sewn in bra but once she was naked I was really amazed at her body, fucking hot!

    She came over all the time that summer, we ended up doing everything except intercourse and it was one of the best summers of my life for sure.

    My Hot Aunt

    My aunt is so fucking hot. she is tall with blue eyes and long brown hair. her lips are always wet and she smells so good. i love her tits and want to play with them so her nipples get hard for me to suck. her ass looks so good i could eat it and i know she shaves her pussy. i want her so fucking bad i think about her to jerk off and i cum so much thinking about what i want to do to her. i am going crazy thinking about her and i need to see her wet pussy. maybe i should tell her how hard i get but i have a small dick and she will laugh. I will never get to touch her or taste her. what can i do ?

  • First Comes The Love Child, Followed By Her Mother

    One day at three in the afternoon a cab stopped in front of my house and a girl with a suitcase got out, and rang the doorbell. She said her name was Phoebe, and showed me a picture of my husband in college, with his arm around a girl. "This is my father".

    Fifteen, nearly sixteen, I got a daughter. Her mother was stressed, lost her job, etc. etc.

    My husband was surprised, didn't deny it, but out of caution we had a DNA test, confirmed with flying colors. What happened next is why I have a problem.

    He flew to 'her' to see what he could do to help her. Come live with us, he told her, lots of room. Start your life over. Except the kiss wasn't just another kiss, he wanted her and possessed her. I'm finding out he still loved her.

    So here we are, if I move out she gets everything, if he moves out, he leaves us together. She's not moving, nowhere to go. So were all stuck under one roof, with a sixteen year old getting to know her father.

    Is It Ok That I Have A Second Family Abroad?

    As a senior pilot who flies internationally, I used to get lonely on my layovers. I guess the usual mid-life crisis also struck, for me, when I turned 52. That year, the youngest of my three sons with my American wife graduated from university and moved across the country. All of a sudden, my wife and I were empty-nesters.

    As I rose on the seniority list, I was assigned to more international flights and given longer layovers. In Manila, my favorite destination, I met a beautiful woman. In all those years of marriage I had never strayed, despite many opportunities. I keep fit, have a decent-size cock, and try to mix the masculine authority that people expect, with the emotional intuition that people need.

    This time, I gave in. Cynthia was only 19 when we met, younger than my youngest son. Yes, I'm sure you're thinking it was just sex, it was exploitative, etc., but no money changed hands, there was no sign she was a gold digger, and I treated her with respect, making sure she enjoyed our nights together as much as I did.

    Soon we were texting non-stop, she, improving her English, and me, motivated to learn some Tagalog. I bid for every Philippine flight I could, and also offered to take over when colleagues were out sick. After six months of regular dating, Cynthia and I had a frank talk. I told her I could not leave my home base in the US, my American wife, or my sons (even though they were grown and had moved out). Yet Cynthia and I knew we had a special connection. I decided to marry her in the Philippines.

    And we started our family. Cynthia might already have been pregnant when I proposed to her. There was so much passion, we never felt the need to take precautions. She is deeply religious and felt that if and when God wanted us to create life, He would make it happen.

    Now I have three young sons in Manila, and a fourth baby (no gender reveal) on the way. I've managed to divide my time between my American wife and my Filipina wife. I've honestly never known as much happiness as this. I am closer to my American wife, more patient and loving toward her, still deeply attracted to her, skilled in pleasing her after so many years. With Cynthia in Manila, every night is a new adventure. She is so innocent, doing everything to please me. She is so energetic, being a mother to my sons during the days, nursing, carrying our next child, and at night, she transforms herself into an exotic Goddess in bed.

    In one sense, what I am doing is wrong, but honestly, I saw no sense in living when I was in the darkest phase of my midlife crisis. I was poised to retired early and withdraw from the world. Cynthia has breathed new life into me, and that cannot be a bad thing.

    She knows about my American family. My eldest son, who has noticed her home when I FaceTime him during my layovers, has an idea that I have met someone.

    Obviously my American wife would not understand, even though my marriage with Cynthia takes nothing away from my marriage with her. I have made arrangements for both of my wives to be well provided-for after I die; they will have no material worries. The last question in my life planning is whether to write a letter to my American wife, to be opened when my will is read, so that she can choose to get in touch with Cynthia if she wants. I have left such a letter for my oldest son, so that he can watch over Cynthia, and his half-brothers, when I am no longer here. I guess that's my only regret - becoming a father again in my early- to mid-fifties means I am less likely to see my new babies through milestones like graduations, first jobs, and marriages. I pray daily that I will be alive for those happy moments.

    Thank you for caring enough to hear me out. Please be kind in the comments. Tell me things that will help me, my wives, and my different generations of children - not things that will tear me down.

    Sex With My Sister Always Feels So Bittersweet

    We've been in love for a long time. After our parents caught us, there was a lot of family therapy. They sent me to a summer camp to wean me off ¡ncestuous desire.

    My sister and I stayed apart for a time. It was agonizing watching her date guys from school. For my part, I couldn't successfully date. I'd be making out with a girl but immediately fantasizing about sis.

    One day we were home and talking and she mentioned the boy she was dating. I just started bawling my eyes out. Months of sadness and loneliness and desire poured out. She comforted me. We kissed. It was as if no time had passed and she had never been with other boys.

    We made love. We didn't care what adults said. They couldn't understand.

    Our parents caught us again, but even they had to concede that I was doing much better when I could be with sis. They laid down some ground rules for us to continue, the main one being that we could not have a baby.

    They gave my sister an IUD for her birthday, so at last we were free from worry.

    Paradoxically, the freedom to love each other brought home the impossibility of our situation. Our parents might have reached a point of grudging acceptance, but the rest of the world would remain forever hostile to our relationship.

    Now I was able to date, knowing that the special bond my sister and I have would always be there.

    We married other people but at family gatherings we still sneak away to be together. We sext every day and masturbate together on Skype. (Now that it's closed, we use Zoom.)

    Our couplings are always so bittersweet. Like Shakespeare's star-crossed lovers, we realize we can never be together in the outside world.

    My Aunt

    I’m living in my aunt’s home while attending college. She’s an attractive woman very, even overly free with her nudity. She told me before I moved in that she doesn’t want my living with her if it means she needed to change her ways. Little did I know, that she meant walking around home nude or near nude. She’s an attractive woman who has every right to be proud of her body. I’m a healthy male and never dared to cross the line and make a move. And her the same towards me. After about 3 months of seeing her nude more than I see myself, I decided to join her. My first was walking into the kitchen after having a shower buck nude while she was making a sandwich. She said, Very nice Rob. I liked it. A lot! We would watch movies together in the raw, well everyday shit in the raw. After dozens of nude encounters I came into the living room with a full hard on, curious as to her reaction. She said, Oh my! You’re a happy boy! With that she got in my face and grabbed my hard on stroking it as we stood facing each other. Does this feel good Robert? Fuck yeah it did. I moved my fingers awkwardly to her pussy. She said, No.. I need your mouth deep kissing my c**t. With that we eat, fucked and sucked on her white leather couch. Last night as I watched the hockey game I said, get over here and suck my cock. She gladly did. It’s going to be a great year.

  • Daughter I Didn't Know

    Recently, I learned I'm father to an adult daughter. Last weekend, we became lovers.

    Here's how that happened: I was a pretty irresponsible kid. I looked older than I actually was, so at 15 I used to go into bars and parties through bribed and a forged ID. I met a girl (let's call her K), legally an adult, somewhere about 5 years older than me. We dated for a few months, and we obviously had sex. Unprotected, most of the time.

    One day, she abruptly ended things, she asked to talk to me and said he had met my parents, who told her the truth. As it was wrong of her to date me, she ended it and disappeared from my life.

    I only recently learned the truth. She had found out where I lived to tell me she was pregnant, and only found my parents at home, I was out for some reason. She explained them everything and was met with the news that she had fucked a minor. My parents secretly got me off the hook by threatening to sue if she came back asking for child support or anything. So I went on to live my life blissfully unaware of what had actually transpired.

    Until a young woman in her late 20s or early 30s reached out to me asking if I had known a woman that went by K's same name. She asked to meet me and told me everything. Turned out her mother was K, which made her my daughter. She didn't want to confront me or anything, making any sort of demand or compensation, she only wanted to know who her father was. Her mother had passed away a couple of years back but had left her the information she had on who I was, in case she wanted to look me up. She looked a lot like her mom, she had pictures of her, the dates checked out and she was registered only with her mother's last name, so I chose to believe her.

    Feeling bad about the whole thing, I accepted her into my life and agreed to keep in touch. I had only been married once a long time ago and had no kids or any prior engagement, and she didn't come to me asking for any money, so there was no reason for conflict. We started going out once every couple of weeks... then we met up once a week... then every couple of days. I could feel us becoming closer, but not in the same way a normal father and daughter would.

    I suspected it was mutual but last Friday, as we watched a movie at my place, she took the remote, suddenly stopped it and told me: "I want you to know I'm ok with what's going to happen now. I'm very open-minded, I love you and I want you in my life". She proceeded to kiss me and I didn't stop her. I was hipnotized from the moment I felt her smell and her soft skin before touching her lips. She sat on my and grinded on me until she came, then gave me the best oral I've ever had, came down her throat. Then I fingered her while I recovered... and then made her love, bareback. It was a Friday, and we stayed the whole weekend, fucking like animals. She's so perverted and sexy. I'm not that into dirty talking, but the moment she called herself "daddy's little cum dumpster", I was out of it. Of course it took on a whole different meaning. We know how wrong it is, but it just made it hotter.

    We were so into this that we were still going at it Monday morning, I arrived late to work. She left for now, but we're meeting again this weekend. I don't know what's gonna happen next. How can it feel so great if it's so wrong? i'm even pondering the possibilities... I haven't told anyone that I have a daughter. She looks nothing like me, does not have my last name and, barring a genetic test, there's almost nothing to show for the true nature of our relationship. I'm seriously considering keeping it up, at least for now...