I'm pretty miserable. My husband has been out of work for almost a year and I've been working my ass off so we can have insurance for our family. We can't afford anything extra. I shouldn't even buy bubble gum. I'm constantly stressed out, but he doesn't seem to get that. I signed up for ashleymadison.com and met a few guys just to have some kind of release. It worked for a little bit, but I'm back to being miserable and stressed out. I fantasize about fucking his best friend who is hard working and able to provide for his family. But most of all, I just wish I could catch a break and have it a bit easier in life. I'm so unhappy, and even though I love him, I have very little respect for a man that can't provide for his family. I drink to forget. Sometimes I wish he'd just leave me, but I love him and would miss him. Not sure my life would be better off without him, and I don't want to vestry my family but I'm losing myself in this negative relationship. Wish I could grow a pair and leave.