If I had another way of confessing this I would, as I also need help with my decission.
Seven years ago my husband and young son were involved in a car accident. My husband was sadly killed and my son has had both his legs amputated from below the knee. He also had major head trauma which has left him with a major speach impediment.
At first it was hard to take and I found it difficult to deal with. With time and lots of after care help, I began to live around my sons needs. Last Autumn one the gentleman who used to arrive once a week to help me with the general care of my son, left his post. His replacement was a younger man named Ryan, who was just two years older than my son. They began to get along great, and within a couple of months I was able to take time away to go shopping and generally have time to myself.
My sons injuries are dibilatating in many respects and his life isn't easy, but even with those factors he does have a fantastic wit and a very positive attitude. He might be disabled but his adult needs at twenty two years old, were and are apparent to me. I'd sort of caught him a couple of times masturbating in the past, without actually seeing his erect penis.
I was out shopping in early February and realised I'd forgotten my purse. Driving back home I went around to the rear of the house knowing I'd left the purse in the kitchen. Picking it up off the work surface I thought I'd go and ask my son and Ryan if they wanted anything for lunch. When I reached the lounge door I saw movement through the door jam and what sounded like my son masturbating again. Peering through I could see Ryan knelt down in front of my son, as he was sat in his wheelchair. Ryan was half naked, his trousers and underwear around his ankles and he was wanking himself, his head was bobbing up and down. It was obvious what they were doing, Ryan was giving my son a blow job and my son was loving it from the sounds he was making.
It's not normal I suppose for a mother to stand and watch her son having sex, but from the point of the accident and up that point in time, I'd looked after him in almost every way possible, other than satisfying his sexual needs. I could see his face and how much Ryan was giving him pleasure. I knew my son had a big penis, even though I'd only seen it flaccid as an adult, but nothing could have prepared me for the sight I saw when Ryan backed away gagging. My sons erect cock was big, really big and very thick.
It was as if I was transfixed. I watched as Ryan took it back into his mouth and began to masturbate my son at the same time. My sons head was rocking backwards as Ryan drew him closer to orgasm. When he came into Ryan's mouth he didn't pull away, but took all of my sons cum and as far as I could tell, he swallowed the lot.
Moving back into the kitchen I went over what I'd just seen and why I hadn't backed away earlier. In truth I had to admit to myself,I was turned on, but I was also slightly annoyed at a professional disregarding his job. Making a few noises I waited a few minutes and then entered the lounge. They were both calm and dressed.
I wanted to tell them both I'd seen them having sex, I wanted to tell Ryan how unprofessional he'd been, but the over riding thing going through my mind was how much it had turned me on. I'd not had sex myself with another person since my sons accident. I'd bought myself a dildo and satisfied myself that way or with my fingers.
I was sat in front of them, frustrated in many ways and the one thing I knew I was jealous of and wanted myself was my sons erect thick cock
In the two months since I've witnessed them having sex, I'm sure they've had sex more often as I give them lots of time alone. The one time I know for sure that they have, I overheard them talking and Ryan was telling my son how much he'd enjoyed taking my sons cock in his arsehole.
Almost every night I either dream or fantasise about having sex with my son and have even bugun to ask him if he wants help bathing. When I've asked him he's had a mischievous glint in his eyes and I've noticed him staring at my breasts and crotch.
That's the reason I'm confessing. I don't have family around me to turn to and wouldn't want to ask the friends I have for obvious reasons. If my son decides to move out and live with another person, whether that be Ryan or someone else, who loves and takes care of him and satisfies his sexual needs, then I'm happy to accept that. But if my son becomes lonely and sexually needy, do I offer myself and help him with those needs??...