while at a private college I used to dress up really sexy business wear and look a real picture most times. silky blonde hair in a bob shape and nice make up, I loved wearing business suits and jackets and short business skirts.

but things got out of hand.

panic set in one day that spelt disaster.

I was talking on a public phone to my mother and a man came up behind me with a knife and bashed the knife into the phone next to me. I ran as fast as I could then to a phone inside a large shopping complex.

a few days later the lifts were playing up and we had to climb the fire escape steps to get to the class room.

I was alone this afternoon and had to use the steps I paniced and held my breath opened the door and started my assent. I tried to go as quickly as possible and I was so scared of facing that knife man when I heard footsteps behind me that sounded like they were catching up to me. I almost screamed when I could feel them getting closer it was a mans steps. I held my breath and tried to act cool. as he got closer I thought "fucking hell am I dead" and he brushed past me in a suit to get to the other offices. and he noticed my fear and just sort of laughed it off and then turned my way at the next flight and said "are you ok" and I was trying to hide my fear but chocking from exhaustion of the run up stairs but of the fear of that knife man. I think he knew I had felt like I seen a ghost. I said "yeh, I'll be fine" he kept going up the stairs. I got to the shabby fire exit door hoping it was my level, because fuck was I unsure and scared as hell. fear of being raped by men in fire exit stair cases is a common fear of mine to the point I will not go to toilets near the fire escape exists in fear of a man coming in from them.

the truth is some guys might wear a hot suite and tie and go to work and still love the thrill of raping women. then you get the drunks with knifes that frighten me more. if I was attacked in a fire escape I think I would choose the cute lawyer who dresses well and lives a double life of depraved sin then the drunken old smelly bum with knifes.

anyway that was my shocking week at college and then after I knew I was going into a psycho-paranoid depression again. but wondered if that pop knife man did not set the whole thing up to scare the crappers out of me.

I felt vulnerable in my tight short business sexy skirts so I wore pantyhose everyday which was nice and slinky and I felt sexy. I masturbated in the college toilet instead of screwing this guy who was too much black hair and controlling Italian for me, trying to make me go to his family ... I liked his sister more then him as she was so cute and was nice to me. I couldn't feel anything at that point because he was screwing with a married woman anyway and playing me and another girl at the same time so I gave up on him.

I would be raped in a stair well office by a nice young businessman any day so long as he warns me when he is coming and gonna make his attack. and I hope he is the picture of a male model or something amazing to play the part.