i have to give oral sex to my foster mom and i do NOT LIKE IT. sometimes she is wating for me when i come home from school and i have to be with her. i do NOT like the taste or smell or how their is so much hair it makes it hard to breath or how long i have to do it for sometimes. but, she sits on my face sometimes and it makes me feel light headed from the weight and i feel so helpless and so powerless, and i start to feel tingeling all over my body but especally down there. and that makes me feel the most ashamed because i know she is turning me into a lesbian.

and i feel so hopeless and alone, no family nobody loves me nobody to turn to. people say omg your so gorgeous and complement my long blond hair and say you could be a model but i feel so horrible about myself inside. im damaged goods, no one would want me if they knew what ive been through.