This confession is not about me coming out as Bi...it is about me being a little(ddlg). I have never told anyone about this side of me, though if someone knows me well enough and knows about ddlg then they could probably connect the dots. All my life i've felt like i'm horrible at relationships because of everything that's happened and because of me being so much like a little girl at times. I have my mature moments of course, but when i'm in a relationship, only when no one else is around, i suddenly turn into a little girl. I've never understood why i do this but when i learned about ddlg a few days ago it just clicked in my brain "that's me...". Well, with the guys that i've been with i've never felt like i could tell them about this side of me so i've never told anyone.
I'm engaged now. I haven't told him about this side of me yet...i'm going to once i see him in a week(long distance)...but i'm so nervous and scared that he might not like this side of me. I love him more than i've ever loved anyone or even liked anyone so i'm more comfortable telling him. I'm just nervous...
The thing that's really messing me up right now...is that i haven't seen him for a few months and haven't talked to him hardly at all because of his work...and i've literally cried myself to sleep so many of these days that i can't count. I've been crying so much the past hour that i think i'm actually making myself sick...idk if something is wrong with me or if that's something that happens to littles sometimes...but all i know is that i need my fiance so much right now i can't even express how much...