To begin with I'm in the closet now but miss the life of being with another man. Anyway I'm a white male and one day I meet this black man and we became good friends. As time went on we done more and more things together. One day we went to the swimming hole looming for other friends. No one was there so we decided to swim. As we got naked I noticed he had a very large cock and it wasn't even hard yet. I had experiences in the past with other men but no one knew. He saw me looking at it and asked me what I thought about it. I tried to tell him I wasn't looking at it but he kept telling me he knew I was. He told me he liked my ass and hoped I would admit I wanted his cock. Finally I got brave and told him I would like to have him in me. He played back and told me to suck him hard. As I went down on him I felt him getting big in my mouth and then it got to be more than a mouthful. He told me finally to get on my knees and slipped it to my ass playing with himself so to get his pre cum oozing out to make my ass slick. This was exciting me. Finally I felt him slip that huge head into me and spread my ass wide. It hurt like hell but I loved it. It took him awhile but he finally got most of it in me. I was so full and wanted it all in me. He reached around and started pinching my nipples and this list made me want to cum. I started pushing back on him in hard pumps and felt him slip all the way in me. I never knew that so much cock and being so full could feel so good. We fucked for awhile and I even got on top and road him as he abused my nipples. They were so tender and sore but I loved it. As I was riding him hard and feeling him deep in me I felt him explode his cum in me and this caused me to shut my cum. I tried to catch it so it didn't get all over him but couldnt . Both of us were totally spent. As I stood up to get in the water to clean up I felt his cum run out my ass and down my leg. This turned me on. I knew he was happy. We member got to do this again. In a few weeks his job moved and so did he. From that moment on I knew I loved black men. I also came to realization that I just like cock. Have always loved to feel cock in me. Now I'm in Missouri near Cape Girardeau Mo.and married to a woman that would never understand me wanting to be fucked. Tried to find a man friend for this purpose but no luck. If someone reads this and your in my area my e-mail is geraldcross601yahoo. Hope to hear from someone and even more I hope to find a special friend.