So I accidentally slept with my ex boyfriend. The problem with this is I'm currently in a great relationship for the first time in my life. I put myself in a bad situation, by agreeing to go out with him that night. He had recently broken up with his long time girlfriend and I considered him to be in need of some social interaction. We went out with a bunch of his friends and he bought me drinks. My medication did not mix well with the alcohol and I vomited. He got me home safely and walked me to my room. First he was just rubbing my back and that was alright. Then it got uncomfortable and I asked him to stop and he said that it was alright and to just relax. He didn't touch me because I kept smacking his hand away and telling him to stop. He's very strong and taller than me though and pinned me down. So I just keep asking him to stop throughout the whole thing, even though it did feel really great, I never stopped asking him to stop. He knew I liked how it felt though : ( which makes me feel gross. I erased all the evidence so that my boyfriend wouldn't find out. I love my boyfriend so much, I just feel bad cause the sex was really incredible in my opinion with my ex. I feel like I can't get clean. Should I just do it again one more time cause this is clearly still in my system or just forget about everything entirely?