I posted a confession before about having to go live with my mother.

I called her, and I'm going to move in with her again. She told me that it's up to me whether I moved in or not, but if I do I'm not allowed to wear any pants whatsoever. Only skirts, dresses, and shorts, and she will go through my clothes and throw out anything that she thinks is too boyish.

I will have to exercise every day, mostly yoga and squats, and go back on a diet. I will grow my hair back out. She will refer to me as her daughter and call me by the name she would have given me if I were born with a vagina both in private and in public.

I will go with her when she does things like shopping, spa days, hair and nails. I will alternate with her cooking and cleaning the house.

She has more rules but she said she will tell me the rest once I'm there.

I am to follow her rules, do as she says, and live full time as a woman as long as I live under her roof. If I break her rules I will be punished in a way to be determined, and if I refuse to follow her rules I will be kicked out at her discretion.

I'm not happy about it, but if I can bear it long enough to get another job and move back out, it's better than sleeping in an alley. Problem is, I'm going to have a hard time finding a job if I have to give credentials.

Even if I find a place that would take me, I'd have to lie and say I was transgender, which I'm really not, or if I am it's not the reason I'm identifying as a woman right now. Things would be a lot simpler if I did turn out to be a trans woman.

God I need therapy.