This year we will have been married for 40 years. I never loved her, not like that. She is more like my sister, we live together and that is fine. She and I haven't had sex in over twenty years. I don't go around telling her when or if I get some woman to bed, but I imagine she knows.

For all practical purposes this has been a marriage of convenience. She comes from a well to do background, which allowed us to live in a very nice house in a very nice neighborhood and our two kids grew up with good schools, university degrees and all. On my salary alone we would never have had that. When I married her I was looking at the money, having grown up on the wrong side of town where the working class lived.

I won't say that I took advantage of her, not in the sense that I never gave back. But it has been a marriage of convenience. I don't know how she entertains herself, or if she ever needs to entertain herself. We haven't shared a bedroom in over twenty years, to each their own. As far as sex with her, she was never a good partner, never cooperated or engaged. From the earliest days I always felt that it was a form of masturbation, except using the real thing instead of your hand.