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Obsessions
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Gender Neutral / 43
Desires
I am the fifth of six Boys. My mother wanted a girl and to her I was the girl, she dressed me as a girl, let my hair grow out, taught to help her in the kitchen, I went by my feminized name, not Steven, I went by Stephanie or Steph for short. I was taught to always use the bathroom alone, sit to pee and never give my sex away as other girls would not understand. I was in the fifth grade when the nurse at school figured out I was a boy. I hated being a boy, hated dressing as a boy, when I got home I changed into my girl clothes, in my house I was a girl, the only sister.
All my life other than school I have lived as Stephanie, lived my life as a woman. I went to college as a woman. My family has always treated me as a woman. I am a woman except when I get an erection and I need to find a way to relieve my urge. I do not find any pleasure with a man, and I have tried very hard to find pleasure with a man. I need to impose my will on a woman, to have sexual intercourse with a woman. I am not particularly interested in her pleasure, or her wish to participate.
All my life other than school I have lived as Stephanie, lived my life as a woman. I went to college as a woman. My family has always treated me as a woman. I am a woman except when I get an erection and I need to find a way to relieve my urge. I do not find any pleasure with a man, and I have tried very hard to find pleasure with a man. I need to impose my will on a woman, to have sexual intercourse with a woman. I am not particularly interested in her pleasure, or her wish to participate.