Obsessed With Sex

October 14, 2016 was the day my father was released on parole. I was 22. Ten years earlier he had been convicted of armed robbery and given 15 years. His parole affected me profoundly. He abused me and my sister, going to jail was good for us. The bad part was becoming really poor.

On that date I must have been behaving strangely. My supervisor told our department head. He called me in to ask me if there was a problem. Maybe the way he spoke to me, how he looked at me, maybe I was going to break anyway. I sat there and told him everything, including my abuse, our poverty, and my fear that my father was coming for me. That's when I was hugged, his arms around me and I cried.

That weekend after my father was rejected by us he went to a friends house and shot himself. When I heard I called my boss. He came over to comfort me. That day I went home with him. That night I asked him if I could sleep with him. Sex came fast, I gave in and grabbed onto him. He asked if I was on birth control and I lied, and asked him to come inside of me.

It's been five years now, I sleep with him and have a two year old. She had his eyes. I need to be hugged and held to go to sleep. I don't like him going out of town. I need lots of sex, too much. He is in his fifties and he prefers to hold me. It only makes me want to have sex even more. From him, I never want sex from anyone else. My therapist thinks it's my fear of losing him.

My mother says I found my father with him. Or maybe I'm a nympho.