I Am A Real Female Sex Addict
I have a diagnosed sex addiction. My counselor says its called Hypersexuality these days because sex addiction is a term gone out vogue. All I can tell you is that I have been rubbing my pussy since as long as I can remember, long before puberty. I have been in therapy for it since I was 16 when my parents walked in on me in our basement being spit roasted by to guys from school. It likely sounds funny reading that, or maybe horny, but I assure you it was humiliating to have my father see me butt-ass naked taking two dicks at once at age 16. I had been fucking since I was 13 and sucking a year or so before that but this how my parents found out.They never found my condom stash, they never questioned my sleep overs, then never checked my web cache, but fuck... they had to find out like this...walking in and finding me naked being double teamed at 16. It fucking hurt for them to find me like that. How do you explain that to the people who raised you and loved you so much that your really a slut and have had sex for years? I had to come clean about my what I was really like and something was wrong with me. They where made, disappointed and ashamed of me but also loved me and helped me get in therapy.
My doctor says it is like OCD but instead of washing my hands I fuck people when I get stressed out of feel anxious. I can see that, maybe, because for me it is in the the rush of either orgasming or making the other person cum that I find a release from whatever is bother me. It's like my fix. I also have no personal shame in it. It's not something I can control. My only shame is in hurting people I love, disappointing them, or cheating on them when they trust me. I keep almost all my side fucking as secret as possible.
I am only 26 but if I told you my real body count you'd be in utter shock and wonder how that is even possible. I have made love in real relationships with people I love but fucking is different, fucking is an addiction, and I can 't stop it, especially when stressed out. I have constantly cheated on guys I was really into or even in love with. To me fucking someone else is not cheating per say, its not personal, it is a fix, getting off, and a boyfriend doesn't need to know about it. I am not really bi, but I have slept with multiple girls too when I didn't have a guy handy. A girl can make me cum too and I have reluctantly learned to eat pussy too. I'd rather suck dick but I'll eat a pussy too because at the end of the day it is all about knowing I made someone cum.
I use Tinder and all the "dating" apps as hook up stash sites. I have multiple convos going on them all at all times incase I need a quick fuck of can squeeze in a hook up when my boyfriend is working or when no one would notice. I learnt long ago not have side boyfriends or fuck buddies, anything relational gets messy. I stick to hook ups and only fuck them a few times max and move on to the next one, hence the high body count. I am not in it for feelings, just sex. When it comes to women I am more picky I guess because it is harder for me to get off with them. I prefer a true lesbian because they eat pussy best. When it comes to guys I honestly don't care what you look like or what your age (you need to be legal) all dicks get me off. It can be anyone. Once I did a 68 year old fat bald married man (and the sex was great!). Sorry wives, i've done so many married men; mostly because they are on those apps a lot. I don't care, I won't take your man for good, I am just fucking him and sending him home. Again I am not looking for love, just guilt free, secret, non judgmental fucking.
And this where I am at... I admit I am an addict ... but I don't want to stop... yet. And before you say in the comments I am just a horny girl experimenting, I am not. This is an addiction, I can't stop myself, and when I spiral I'll get as bad as calling out of work to spend all day playing with my pussy and hunting for fucks. I have went on benders where a took pride in fucking a new guy daily. I once fucked 5 different complete strangers in a 24 hour period (I didn't even sleep). I know this is horrible for me, and I get out of control.I always use safer sex. As out of control as I get, I do nothing without condoms and I am on the pill for backup. I do regular std testing that my counselor sees, and I have never caught anything yet. Honestly, I keep a current boyfriend mostly to slow me down and to make it harder to cheat because I have someone asking questions. I know if I did not have him I'd spiral and maybe even loose my job again for calling out.
I need to stop. I don't want to.
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