Spice Girl Fail

When I was a kid I was fat. I sat in front of the TV and watched Spiceworld over and over. I wanted to be a famous singer. I would practice dancing and singing like Posh Spice every night and get on the computer and memorize facts about the Spice Girls. I was convinced 100% that I was destined to be a famous pop star when I grew. Up. I mean, I just knew it. I’d sit on the swings at recessing dreaming about it.

As it turns out, I did not grow up to be a famous singer. Major bummer. But hey, at least I lost my baby fat.