I Think I'm Lesbian

I put bisexual in the description because I did have 1 girl with whom I had sex for about a year. We weren't out, we weren't displaying in public it was totally private. I had never had sex before, and she even broke my hymen with her fingers, but only after I was ready to let her. After than I never had sex with another woman. I've had 2 men in my life, one ex who divorced me for being a cold fish, and my second husband who died. On the second one, quite frankly I bucked and heaved, breathed heavily and pretended I was cumming everytime, sometimes multiple times. But my only orgasms were with myself on his frequent out of town travels and then thinking about my lesbian lover in college. I had one child with my second husband who is now grown.

Now I'm on my own, pension, house and car paid for and all I can do is think about that lesbian sex. I looked her up online, and we communicate via chat but she is happily married and fulfilled. I really want to try it with another woman again, but have no idea how to go about it. I'm really shy sexually and personally, I just don't know how to find another woman who would be interested, nor where to find someone. I really want to try it again though. I think I could finally have an orgasm that I didn't initiate.