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Funny As Fuck
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Straight Male / 41
I Never Knew
I'm home unexpectedly for a few days while my truck is at the dealer for a wiring issue. My wife picked me up and brought me home, about a 2 hour drive. On the way, she said she would call her friends and cancel their Wednesday coffee day, but I told her it was okay, I'd stay upstairs out of the way, do whatever she had planned. So, Wednesday we sent our son to school and I headed upstairs figuring I'd watch some Netflix or something. Around 10, I heard her friends show up, so I kept the volume low not to interrupt them.
About 10 minutes after the first 2 showed up, I heard Lisa, our rather boisterous neighbor come in. The girls all said hello and I heard them start asking why Lisa was standing. here's the part I didn't expect, those women talk nastier than truckers! Lisa blurted out that she wont be able to sit or shit right for a week. Her husband Tony fucked her ass and she's been farting and pooping cum all night. I wasn't ready for that!
Denise, a girl my wife knows from school laughed so loud, I muted the tv. Denise started explaining that she wont let her husband fuck her ass without a condom because the cum dribbles out while she's sleeping and its usually brownish. I didn't know that girls day was so descriptive. Christine, said she wished she had that problem. That her husband and her started out wild and crazy, going to swingers clubs and stuff, but that he doesn't last even a minute when he gets into her. He can jerk off to porn for an hour without cumming, but he's a 2 pump chump! ( her words). Then she told the rest that she doesnt think the twins are hers, that one night she went to a swingers party and her husband was watching 2 girls making out, and she got fucked by at least 4 guys. 6 weeks later and she was pregnant! Lisa asked if he was hung, and Chris said he was ok, then I guess she used her hands to show how big. Lisa blurted out, "Not my Tony, he's a White Claw can!" and they all shut up!
They all were cackling and throwing comments when Christine said it didnt matter her husband was too small for her anyway. Denise was saying that her son's tball coach was hot! She would let him fuck her anyway he wanted. She almost slipped when her husband was going down on her and said the coach's name! I was waiting for my wife to say something, but stayed pretty quiet throughout. They went on like that until after 12 when my wife said she had to pick up my son at pre-K. They all said their goodbyes, and next week is at Denise's house.
When my wife got home, she came upstairs to check on me and I had the tv back on and pretended I was asleep. She asked, but I told her I never heard a thing. I had no clue how women talk when they are alone.
About 10 minutes after the first 2 showed up, I heard Lisa, our rather boisterous neighbor come in. The girls all said hello and I heard them start asking why Lisa was standing. here's the part I didn't expect, those women talk nastier than truckers! Lisa blurted out that she wont be able to sit or shit right for a week. Her husband Tony fucked her ass and she's been farting and pooping cum all night. I wasn't ready for that!
Denise, a girl my wife knows from school laughed so loud, I muted the tv. Denise started explaining that she wont let her husband fuck her ass without a condom because the cum dribbles out while she's sleeping and its usually brownish. I didn't know that girls day was so descriptive. Christine, said she wished she had that problem. That her husband and her started out wild and crazy, going to swingers clubs and stuff, but that he doesn't last even a minute when he gets into her. He can jerk off to porn for an hour without cumming, but he's a 2 pump chump! ( her words). Then she told the rest that she doesnt think the twins are hers, that one night she went to a swingers party and her husband was watching 2 girls making out, and she got fucked by at least 4 guys. 6 weeks later and she was pregnant! Lisa asked if he was hung, and Chris said he was ok, then I guess she used her hands to show how big. Lisa blurted out, "Not my Tony, he's a White Claw can!" and they all shut up!
They all were cackling and throwing comments when Christine said it didnt matter her husband was too small for her anyway. Denise was saying that her son's tball coach was hot! She would let him fuck her anyway he wanted. She almost slipped when her husband was going down on her and said the coach's name! I was waiting for my wife to say something, but stayed pretty quiet throughout. They went on like that until after 12 when my wife said she had to pick up my son at pre-K. They all said their goodbyes, and next week is at Denise's house.
When my wife got home, she came upstairs to check on me and I had the tv back on and pretended I was asleep. She asked, but I told her I never heard a thing. I had no clue how women talk when they are alone.
- That's Juicy! 46
- Remove It! 1
