Me And Cousin

Some years earlier I posted the same thing but i will post it again in different words.
When i was 7-8 my cousin and i were to our grandparents's house. One day both of us were in our grandparents bedroom.
There my cousin told me to play the doctor. We were the same age. I agreed because I was interested. She took off my shirt and started kissing me on my chest. I liked it so i didn't stop her. She told me to do the same to her and i did it.
After that a lot of times where we were at our grandparents house we went in the bedroom under a table and kissing and licking each other's chest and belly.
I liked it so much that i told her to lick my chest again and again.
These stuff happening in my house too when she was coming for a visit with her parents. These stuff were happening in secret. Our parents didn't know.

Someday I wanted to masturbate together in my house in the living room but she didn't want it unfortunately.

I realize this experience was the only sexual or romantic experience that i truly enjoyed. So far i had sex 2 times and did 6-7 blowjobs to older men but i didn't like it. I don't have much experience but nothing was even close to what i felt back then with my cousin.

I wish i had more sexual experiences with boys and girls back then and lost my virginity by an 11-12 year old boy at the age of 9-10.
A lot of times i wish my cousin was a boy so we could go further and had sex or at least a blowjob.

These fantasies come and go in my mind but sometimes are strong like this moment.

I'm glad some people here post confessions when they were kids because i can fantasize myself as a child and being part of their stories and satisfy my fantasies and desires.

I am aware these fantasies aren't social acceptable but i can't help not to get wet when i have them or read about them by others (real or fake).