From The Gutter Back To Holding Your Head High

My life crashed when I was twenty. I partied too much, got involved with the wrong crowd, got into a sexual relationship with a woman of all things. Toxic, controlling woman. Flunked out, no money, I crawled home with my tail between my legs. Things exploded when this woman called my mother and demanded she send me back to her.

I got a part time job, enrolled at City College trying to revive my college chances. I was too strung out, still in withdrawal from stuff and that woman to pay attention. I lost my job and I dropped out. Rock bottom is what the man called it.

I went into the program against my will. It was a camp out in the woods. Not just me either, a dozen middle class girls, parents spending the mortgage for them. It hit me, like vomiting, crying, shaking, knowing my life was over, no one wanting me, my future a waitress at Denny's. That's when I hit rock bottom.

I'm walking around today, going to the mall, watching the kids play in the back yard. Middle class suburban housewife, with a degree in Political Science from City College. I'm not hot, barely pretty. Twenty five pounds too many. Hard to believe I have three kids. I went through the program, you have to go through the program. Finish it.

There is light. A life. Suburban housewife or nurse, or whatever. Don't give up on yourself. And don't fall for the wrong crowd.