I disagree with the comment above. Life can be more complicated sometimes...
I am in a similar situation. After 4 years of a secret relationship with a wonderful woman, I decided we should stop seeing each other as it was unfair on my wife , whom I do love, and on my gf , whose life was kind of on hold. Only able to see me, speak to me etc when it suited me , not her. She's also younger than me and needs to get her own independent life back.
But it's been really difficult, and we think about each other all the time , and occasionally send messages. I'm trying to be so good about this, but I fear I will crack at some point.
OP, I have no real solution for.you I'm afraid. But it looks as though, like me, you have found out that it's possible to love two people.
Have sex with him a few times and see how you feel then. If you keep it quiet you can have some fun. If it’s crossed your mind then you might as well do it.
You're so fucked, in every possible way.
While you think it's love, it could easily turn into something else. You just don't know because you don't really know the person. You can never tell how a relationship is going to go until the butterfly stage is done. If you play the "what if" game, expect it to go bad within a few months.
Or you can cut yourself off from the temptation like you already should have, and be a decent person and either fully commit to your existing relationship, or if it's not working, end it and move on. The side piece makes it more intoxicating and is actually a red herring.
Fuck and see how you feel
If you don't fuck him you will never know how good or bad it was
