The 4th Of July From Hell Part 1

Another Holiday from Hell has come and pass which brings potential fines, lawsuits, debt, and headaches to come.

All of my family, neighbors, friends, co workers, bosses, and yes celebrities showed up to The Cookout From Hellas we had food, fireworks, a pool, cornhole, and a Wrestling Ring in the Backyard for this cookout.

First Jim and Jerry did nothing but argue over the way to grill hamburgers which lead to the two of them flaring their tempers at each other.

Jerry decided to flip out and flipped a table full of condiments over yelling

"You're gonna burn my burgers you son of a bitch."

Jim flipped back and yelled "All you do is whine and cry like a little baby everytime you don't get your way."

Jerry threw the Potato Salad at Jim and Jim threw burgers at Jerry and the two engaged in an all out barbecue brawl.

Jerry and Jim fought all over the backyard as the rest of the family, my father in law, and my boss tried to seperate the two. as they fought on top of tables and throwing food until my father in law yelled.

"I'm tired of you two and you're goddamn fighting, i you want to fight, fight in the ring."

Jim and Jerry got in the ring to wrestle eachother as everyone gathered around to watch two grown ass men wrestling in a wrestling ring but this feud between Jim and Jerry has gone on their whole lives.

Jim and Jerry fought eachother in the ring and then the next thing you hear is my co worker David farting holding his ass and had his mouth wide open looking like an inflatable doll moving towards my boss as he pulled his pants down and shit fell onto my yard after David Shit his Pants.

My Boss then took toilet paper and began to wipe David's ass in front of the entire cookout as kids all laughed at David getting his ass wiped by my boss.

The next thing that happened was the sound of "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH WHAT A RUSH"

Here comes Uncle George wearing face paint, spiked shoulder pads, pantyhoes, and high hells roaring on a motorcycle saying "Mary Anne" over and over until he crashed his motorcycle into my boss's table and wrecked his burger.

Mary Anne is my Boss's wife who George slept with and My Boss found out.

George took my Boss's burger and went Hawk Tuah and spit in it and it lead to an all out brawl between George the Cross Dressing Road Warrior and my boss.

Then comes Fred dressed like Uncle Sam and was barefoot and drunk and started singing the words to Real American AKA Hulk Hogan's theme and started waving the American Flag and stood on top of a table with his bare feet getting in everyone's food as he stood on top of the table to sniff his fucking feet before falling off the table and on his ass with food covering him.

Everyone laughed as Fred as he went over to the restroom as now Jennifer and Kimberly were ready to fight eachother.

Kimberly and Jennifer was set to compete in a Beauty Pageant and they were at eachother's throat as they threw food at eachother, started pulling each other's hair and the catfight was on.

Kimberly and Jennifer started throwing food and squirting ketchup, mustard, and barbecue sauce at eachother and having a food fight and pulling eachother's hair having a catfight on the table and getting covered in food.

Then both Jennifer and Kimberly were temporarily separated as I suggested to fight in the pool and they did as they got into their bikinis and had a catfight in the pool while Jerry and Jim were still fighting in the ring.

Then Chad shows up wearing American Flag Underwear and Socks as he took some bananas and started dancing with bananas at the cookout.

Chad stuffed a Banana in his underwear and gave himself a blowjob and then started to do a headspin dance in his underwear.

Then here comes Arthur showing up completely naked as he took a Hot dog and went over to grab a Cornhole Board and placed it on top of a picnic table and put the hotdog in the corn and umbrella hole and had a three way with the Cornhole board and the Picnic Table.

Louise started yelling "OH MY GOD ARE YOU NUTS" like how she reacted on The Maury show when she talked about her mustard phobia and then Arthur squirted Louise with Mustard and she flipped her shit.

Then Steven The Videomaster showed up hitting everyone with VHS Tapes shouting "HE HIT HIM WITH A VIDEO" and went over to the ring and hit both Jim and Jerry with VHS Tapes and pushed them into the Pool.

Then Steven went over to My Boss's table and he too ka VHS Tape and Hit my Boss with a Video and smashed his head into the apple pie and I know for sure i'm getting fired after this as Steven stood on top of the table guzzling a beer can and smashing it on his head as if he has enough brain damage and then, oh boy.

The Ecto One parked into the Driveway as Steven went over to it telling Finn Wolfhard, Logan Kim, and the rest of the Ghostbusters to get out of the Ecto 1 and get hit with VHS Tapes.