My Story, For Your Enjoyment

I come from a French family that settled in southern USA. I grew up in a bicultural environment, I was French at home, but very USA at school and work. I spoke reasonable French, but not business French, growing up and to perfect my French I lived in Paris for five years working for an American French consortium. It was during that time that I began to feel that I had an attraction to certain men. To put it bluntly, I wanted to be kissed. I wanted this man to kiss me.

The moment arrived when I was alone with him and I kissed him on the cheek. He didn't respond. Later that evening when we were each going our way there was a small kiss on the lips. I was receptive and the kiss was a bit longer. Soon I was kissing with him and was in bed with him engaging in sex with him. The hunger in me was too much for me and he would calm me down by making me sit and do nothing. Except stand in front of me naked. The only thing I could do, that I had permission to do, was turn over and lay on my stomach naked and open my legs for him. Present myself to him, offer myself to him. Which I did and he took advantage of it and I learned how much I enjoyed being sexually mauled by him.

I was transferred to West Africa. In West Africa there are many strong black men. I won't say that I wasn't impressed by them, especially black men who stood naked with me. I worshipped them and engaged in sex with them. Always of course, let them engage me, I presented myself to them. I should note here that gay sex is not accepted, so these engagements were strictly most confidential and careful.

I later transferred back to the US and found gay activities much more relaxed and plentiful. I became involved with a gay policeman and enjoyed the gay community he belonged to. At my work I did not advertise myself, but it was 'obvious'. Perhaps the way I look at certain men who I day dream that I will be kissed by them.

I am currently in a relationship with a closeted gay man. As I have grown older I have become more and more submissive. I identify with certain women's traits, wanting to 'serve' and be 'useful'. We do not share a living space, he lives with his 'wife' of many years. She enjoys going out with the 'girls', a marriage of convenience. As always I enjoy when he kisses me and I enjoy presenting myself to him. Knowing that he is about to engage me in sex is a moment that I look forward to. The anticipation is addictive. Always has been.