I'm 16 mow, my brother is 13, and our sisters are 14 and 10 and mom's 33. Our entire family is fucked.

My dad was a sick shit. He screwed with me and my brother and sisters and mom and made us screw each other and other people so he could enjoy it. I don't know how old I was the first time he pimped me out or made me screw mom. And he would jerk off or have someone suck him while he beat one of us with a belt.

When I was 9 dad was arrested for hitting cops while doing rock. We tore the house apart found all the money he hid and moved to another state.

We did a lot better the kids all went to school and mom could get work. But we were still different from everyone. When I or my brother would have a nightmare we didn't think anything of going to our sister or mom in the middle of the night and screwing one of them until we were relaxed. And they did the same thing.

Sex doesn't mean a lot to any of us except a quick release. We don't really get horny, we just get an urge. Our sex boundaries are all screwy. We had a few problems with my sisters getting screwed by strange men but we keep that part of our weirdness pretty quiet.
Our house is run different. Mom isn't in charge, we're more a democracy I guess. We just figure out what we need to do and do it.

Guys at school call me Spock sometimes because I never seem to get excited. My older sister is real goth and my little sister is called Wednesday Adams in her school. My brother used to cut himself and we keep an eye on him. Mom drinks a lot. We're all sort of numb.
When I was younger I'd screw someone every now and then cause I felt anxious. Now I'm doing it a couple of times a day. Sometimes I slap them and don't know why. I think I have anger problems.

Comments

Anonymous

by Anonymous on Oct 4, 2010 at 2:11 PM

Dude, get therapy. No, get a therapist to move into your house full-time.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 28, 2010 at 8:19 PM

How traumatic for all of you. Thankfully you guys moved and moved away from your dad. I am so sorry you had to go through that. Sleeping with family members is not normal. That behavior should stop. You need to be able to learn how to express yourself and be able to find a love and be loved and not use sex to do so. Or if you have the urge to not sleep with a family member. You deserve to have a happy fulfilling life. Please contact rainn.org It's a rape and incest organization. They have resources available for you and your family that can help you work through some of this.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Jun 29, 2012 at 11:16 PM

That's terribly traumatic.

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