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Sex Experiments

I consider myself straight. But had some bi experience with best friend . It would happen when we did coke together. Started at jacking off in front. Then to jacking each other then to sucking each other 4 different times. My problem is that happened 30 years ago and I still fantasize about the last time. I was married and wife was gone out of town and he came over and we ended up just jacking off in front of it other. Now I replay the night and wish it went like this. Before he gets there I go out and get condoms,lube . He comes in and I tell him I've got porn and we should write down different things we want to do. He always made hints about fucking each other. So I wrote on each card different ways to suck each other. He wrote on his cards sucking on some and fucking each other different ways. We then start playing cards and loser had to draw a card we wrote on and perform act. We stay naked all night and we start by sucking each other every way imaginable. Then we draw his cards and put condoms on and fuck each other We have moved away from each other but I still think this thoughts and haven't told anyone and want to call and ask him if he still fantasize about it. Years ago I scored some coke one night and stop by sex store and purchased dildo and went home and jack off and fucked the dildo all night. I never think of any other man's cock and wouldn't do it with anyone except my friend. The guilt is killing me. I am remarried and would never tell my wife but wish sometimes wished one day she would ask to peg me

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